this post was submitted on 30 Mar 2026
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submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by bleistift2@sopuli.xyz to c/programmer_humor@programming.dev
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[–] plateee@piefed.social 34 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

We are Flowers for Algernoning our technology.

If I use my phone (not android Auto), I can no longer say, "Navigate to ". It flat out does not work.

Navigate to Local Bakery Xyz.

I'm sorry I can't do that.

(It tries to open the non-existent app for the local bakery).

If I'm in the car that has android auto, it refuses to let me type while in drive (fair enough) and it recognizes the "Navigate to..." Instructions, but if I click on the Maps nav bar for voice and say my destination (it literally says, no text while driving speak your destination)... It tries to open the app.

This shit used to work, it's getting actively dumber.

This morning I got fed up and asked,

"Can I use you to navigate somewhere?"

Sure! Where would you like to go?

"Dutch Bros"

(Opens the Dutch Bros app)

[–] Dogiedog64@lemmy.world 10 points 18 hours ago

I once tried to ask my phone to set an alarm. It said it did.

I checked the app. No alarm set.

I tried again, but with a timer. It said it was set.

Again, nothing.

I gave up on digital assistants after that. They took them out back and shot them, and what we see now is their rotted corpse puppeted by Shareholder Value™️ gone wrong. This was 2022.