Memes

My mom insisted on taking me on a cruise for my birthday. I left that boat wanting to full blown Ted Kaczynski.

A cruise ship is just press where the wealthy wring as much money out of people as possible. You're there to drink and gamble. If you don't like doing either of those then you can go to any one of the dozens of events where people are, surprise surprise, drinking and/or gambling. I guess there were a few events that were just marketing for scummy tat or services too. There is nothing you can do that doesn't cost money even with the "free" perks. We had a free drink package but god forbid you forget to tip for every fucking drink including if you just want some fucking water. Oh you one a free massage? Well guess what, it's not actually free. It's free after you buy the base package. Plus at the end of the cruise they automatically charge you a $160 "gratuity" just for existing because fuck you. The whole thing was unabashedly scummy; It felt like spending a week trapped in a car dealership.

Our time off the boat was at tourist trap islands which had all been pillaged so thoroughly that tourism is now all they have. Some of those islands still had some natural beauty but looking at it also just pissed me off because there was nowhere you could look and not see what little remained being actively destroyed. The snorkeling trips were even more infuriating, nothing quite makes you hate people like snorkeling in dead garbage filled reefs.

I want to see every cruise company executive sent through a woodchipper feet first. I want every cruise ship turned into an artificial reef.