Let’s look at that same sentence with one subject swapped out for charger.

Would you want a requirement that a 4 pump location with no cover is staffed 24/7 just to provide gas for a car and stick it in and pull a trigger? Thats a crazy high cost to avoid the not-frequent damage you’re trying to address.

Right, its an unnecessary waste of money that 49 of the the 50 states in the union have done away with.

but I guarantee if someone’s working there, those things aren’t getting broken while they’re on the clock and their job is threatened.

...and...

… but… again… they don’t take care of their shit. None of them do

You're suggesting one way to address broken chargers. What you're suggesting is an unnecessarily expensive way. Ask yourself this: if employing an on-site worker is the only way to prevent broken chargers, how is it that the largest charging network of DC fast chargers (Tesla Superchargers with 1,246 fast charging locations ) not only doesn't use an on-site worker, yet also has the most reliable chargers with the highest operational uptime?

Do they simply make a better charger? Possibly, but I've still seen an occasional non-working stall. Out of 20 visits to a 20 stall EV charging location I might see one stall not in full operation. So the Supercharging network clearly has technicians that are keeping things repaired, and it doesn't take someone sitting on a stool at the location for at least 8 hours a day to make this happen. So you say none of the charging companies take care of their networks, except the largest network operator of DC fast chargers does.

For whatever reason, folks seem to think that because EV is new, it’s not subject to the same shitty human behavior we see everywhere else where no one is forced to provide adequate staffing.

Adequate staffing doesn't mean an on-site worker sitting there everyday waiting for a charger to break to report it. That seems to be the solution you're championing.

Gas is treated like a store…

Rightfully so. Gasoline (and diesel) stored in large quantities can be dangerous. Leaks into soil cause large problems of contamination. Contaminated fuel can cause damage to consumers vehicles. These are storage and product purity concerns for private gas station owners. A commercial distribution network for volatile liquids is a safety issue. Electricity has neither of these.

None of that applies to electricity where we pipe it into our homes everyday. Why would you treat electricity transport the same as gasoline transport when they don't have the same dangers and don't behave the same?

Until the rules FORCE companies to take care of shit, it will be the same as slum lords do. Bare minimum to set up, get as much cash as they can reasonably suck out of people stopping to charge, and then letting it go to shit once any sort of subsidies fade away.

You're misinterpreting the problem. I get it. Its complicated, but you're seeing the same symptoms as I am but you're attributing the wrong reasons to why those symptoms exist.

Lets start here:

Who owns the biggest EV charging networks (by DC fast charging locations) in the USA?

1. Tesla Superchargers - owned by Tesla. Tesla has an incentive to maintain a high quality charging network so that people will feel comfortable buying Tesla cars and know they can travel long distances reliably. I think Tesla has been successful with this.
2. Chargepoint - each charger is owned by hundreds of individual businesses. To my knowledge Chargepoint corporate doesn't own any of the deployed chargers. Each individual owner is responsible for maintaining their Chargepoint charger. Alternatively, the owner can contract with Chargepoint corporate to maintain the owner's charger for a high fee. This is why you have some Chargepoint chargers that are very well maintained, and others which are always broken: Many different owners each with their own goals and resources.
3. Electrify American - Owned by a company forced to exist because of VW's emissions cheating scandal. This company has a mandate to set up chargers, but zero incentive to maintain them.
4. EVgo - originally created by NRG Energy for regulatory compliance. The company has changed hands a number of times since creation. It looks like their current motivation is to make money only through selling EV charging electricity. Essentially the pure retail charging play. They do a decent job of maintaining their chargers, but they also have some of the highest fees for charging. I personally consider them a "charger of last resort" because I know I'll pay more at an EVgo charger than any other retail charger.

So two of the 4 were created by forced regulatory compliance. Yet the most successful of the 4 in terms of reliability is the one that has an incentive to have working chargers available at the most places all the time with no regulatory requirement.

Don't think that I'm a proponent of laissez faire capitalism. Quite the opposite! Put regulations where they are needed. Perhaps there are some needed yet in EV charging, but forcing charging companies to staff them like gas stations is not it.