It's a change in your reality and it's a shift in your perspective to have this all happen at once. But beware looking back and bullying yourself. You are who your are and always have been, a label like ADHD won't change you. Remember yo appreciate yourself even in tough times

I also lost my father around the same time that I found out I was diagnosed ADHD (actually misdiagnosed I later found out) and my brain was racked between taking care of my mother and trying to get through it myself. And then in top of all that, the anxiety of going through everyday life wondering if I’ve lost the chance to be who I wanted to be.

The only thing that helped me was telling my close friends what was going on and how much I felt like everything was crushing me. I did end up on medication for bi-polar 1 which has helped me stay more focused without feeling low.

I’m sorry for your loss my friend.