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HP CEO: You're 'bad investment' if you don't buy HP supplies (www.theregister.com)
submitted 7 months ago by ylai@lemmy.ml to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world
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[-] OhFudgeBars@lemmy.world 49 points 7 months ago

we sort of see a 20 percent uplift on the value of that customer because you're locking that person, committing to a longer-term relationship.

Do these people never listen to themselves? Who the hell wants to be "locked"?

[-] sirdorius@programming.dev 36 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

CEO: "We have observed through careful analysis that by locking our customers inside the restaurant, they will continue to order food from us in order to not starve. Therefore, from now on, all doors shall now be one way only"

Investors: "What brilliant entrepreneurship!"

this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2024
210 points (97.7% liked)

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