Heyuh, any hot tips on how I can get the hell out of this abuse house? BioParents have decided that one "no" is far too many and they've decided to try to break into my room. They're yelling a bunch of bullshit and telling me to get out but also they're trying to work out how to break into my room?!
I'm in rural northeastern Oklahoma; I've got a bit of money (assuming they don't rob me of that somehow) but no real means of supporting myself because I'm autistic and agoraphobic in the middle of nowhere, relying on them for everything. I've finally got just a little bit of help (some medications at least, nothing fancy) and it's just too little too late I guess.
tl;dr: BioParents threatening, bullying me. Need some kind of lasting escape, need help creating my own life if such thing is possible. Need to never be here again.
Edit: Sorry, I'm a bit scattered. Sorry if this is the wrong place for this. Couldn't find anywhere that is. Also I may lose "their" Internet connection because cutting me off from help is totally not abusing me but actually a reasonable way for them to "take back their property" (they want all of my keys as part of throwing me out, I've never been able to deal with confrontation and they know it... blah blah BS). May be able to use my phone... ugh.
Edit 2: They called the cops on me.
Edit 3: The guy with the Punisher tat explained that no one had done anything wrong but they can't throw me out without going through the eviction process. BioMom has been through that process before (she used to run an apartment complex!) so she damn well knew she couldn't do that, and that the cops wouldn't help her unless they were just hardcore transphobes who'd just as soon shoot me. No shock to me, the only logical reason she called them was to bully me harder or just get me killed.
Edit 4: Night now, managed a kitchen+toilet trip. Didn't get thrown directly into jail nor "institutionalized" for daring to disobey my dear sweet loving and supportive (sarcasm) mother and her imaginary right to invade every detail of my life. Still don't know where to go. I'm too old for many things, too young for others. Kinda afraid (ashamed?) to even try to contact any kind of shelter because like... they've got a handful of rooms and I'm gonna ask for one because I'm a thirty-something loser who's broken and getting thrown out? They made me broken and they're throwing me out for trying to keep one single detail of my life from her but... damn, is that really fair to ask, when others have been through so much worse? Besides, probably nowhere has any space available, so I'll just be stressing over a phone call or whatever and get nothing from it but more stress. FML, wish I'd been born to an actually decent family or not at all. (Edit 4b: No-go on the whole family/friends thing.)
Edit 5: Still alive! Feels like none of this is even real, like I must've just dreamed it all. I think it's this room messing with my head, like nothing can ever change. Am just yapping I guess đ€· (Edit 5b: Oh, edits count as bumps. Sorry >.<; )
Edit 6: Now BioMom's lashing out at BioDad too. Apparently she's going to take us to hell with her when/after(?) she dies. What the actual fuck. Anyway, in case he comes and kills me I'd like to mention that the new name I've been flirting with is Keris. Nocritter asked and I'm in no state to be soul-searching right now but I kinda want to say it, I guess. Might as well try to be as me as I can when I don't know if there's gonna be a me in ten minutes. On the plus side, if she decides to still go to her thing on Monday I'll have a window for escape. Just have to figure out how, and where to go.
Edit 6b: Okay, not dead yet. No idea what's going on out there; haven't heard anything in a while. Realized I may sound a little insane being afraid of BioDad when BioMom is the one screaming about taking people to Hell with her. She's very movement impaired and can't get to my end of the house on her own. Sad, yes. Complicated. He, on the other paw, is as cruel as she lets him get by with. He's always been physically intimidating (though not yet "violent"), verbally abusive, always looking to do as much damage as he can without her scolding him for it. So if she's not a factor... he's a threat.
Edit/Update 7: They taped a seven-day eviction notice to my door. Looks like state law requires thirty but Idunno if I can last that long anyway, given I'm afraid to even cross the lil hallway to get to the toilet. I'm very not okay, I need somewhere safe to go, at least long enough to calm down and figure out what the hell to do but there's just nothing for it. Might be able to afford a hotel for a couple weeks if I don't eat. I'm not eating anyway so maybe that's not so bad. No friends, no family, no space in shelters (and I don't meet anyone's criteria anyway), no place to go if I do manage to leave, no idea where else to even try or ask. Hell, I'm almost out of bottled water too. If any brave adventurers wanna swoop in and rescue me, now's the time :-\
Thanks, but they're not nearly techy enough to do anything but pull the cables out of the ISP-provided (and locked, which I've never stopped being angry about) router, which is out there with them.
vents quietly about how evil somebody's got to be to think "Oh, you said 'no' to me so I'm going to take everything, cut you off from everyone, and throw you out to die miles from the nearest town. Because I'm so concerned about your health!"
Oof, ISP-controlled stuff sucks. I hear it's also usually the cheapest crap they can buy too.
You on desktop, laptop, mobile, etc? A library should be a safe point to access the internet in a pinch if you don't have a device available or otherwise need to charge devices, and likely has wifi, no idea if that's available to you though in rural Oklahoma (I've driven through, completely understand the nothingness and red dirt.)
You are ABSOLUTELY worthy of shelter, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise! Shelters exist for a reason.
To add more, its worth downloading as wide an area of Google maps as you can so that you have offline maps
Oh fuck, I really hope they come to some senses and don't do that, pleas keep us updated, we all are concerned for you
I've just been alternating between hoping, like if I can get my money out of my bank account (no taxis around here, no friends/family, no car, too far from anything for biking even if I had one) I can pay at least to get probably anywhere I need to, but I don't feel safe enough to even be seen by those people and I have no idea how to plan and execute that whole process of getting somewhere else even if I had somewhere to go. Then there'd be the "getting settled in" part, finding income, making sure I don't lose any meds, etc. Maybe somewhere in all' these lists of "resources" (which are everything from philosophical essays to lists of doctors to broken links to places that had probably helped someone before vanishing) I'll find something useful. Eventually. But... I could? Maybe?
... and then unhoping, like there's no point bothering because there's no life for me but abject misery in this hell-world and it's too late for me to create a whole-ass life for myself nor get enough help and healing to actually make and live it anyway.
Also I just scared myself with my own computer's noises and I'm suddenly rethinking having a bath like I'm gonna get caught. Might try to eat something. [darkness redacted] stops frustratey-upsetty-rambling
Sweet of you to say, though. Thanks.
You can always come to us, if there is no one left, we'll try out best to be there for you