cross-posted from: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/13998559

Reaching Out For Help

After much consideration and fighting with my brain, I've decided that it's okay to ask for help in hard situations. So, I'm making this in hope that I receive at least a little bit of help. I'm asking for money, friends, and any advice you can give me. Everything counts and will help me during this rather terrible time. I'm Uni (name TBD) and I'm a 16 y/o transgirl unfortunately situated in the USA. You may know me as a regular on the Blahaj Matrix chats going by "Miss Universe".

So a little bit (a lot?) of backstory to sort of explain my current situation. My egg cracked October last year and it was both the best and worst thing that has happened in my life so far. Being a minor means that I can't really do anything about the fact that my egg cracked, I'm fully relying on the people around me to help me (which has failed). Put simply, as a minor I have absolutely no control over my body or my life, I have no money, no experience, and nowhere to go.

I came out to my mother and step-father (my parents are divorced) February this year, and while they seemed to be supportive at first they semi-recently turned on me and have been mostly unsupportive since then.

As for my father and step-mother, they are both actively transphobic republicans. I have no plans on coming out to them until after I turn 18, and it would be unsafe to do so before then.

Basically, as of now I have basically no support from anybody in my life and I'm completely trapped as my dysphoria gets worse with each passing day.

With my situation sort of explained(?), why am I actually here? Pretty much I'm here because I need money. Money for clothes, makeup, just stuff that can hopefully help me alleviate some of my dysphoria until I'm able to afford to do so myself (which as a minor is difficult). And also I suppose gas, in case it comes to it and I need to run away, even for a short period. I'm also looking for advice, I don't really know what to do and it would be really nice to have at least some semblance of what I could be doing right now.

I don't really know if any of that made sense, I'm bad at organizing my thoughts and even worse at asking for help. If you have any questions post them in the comments and I can probably answer them.

You can support me here on Buy Me a Coffee if you so wish, and/or with advice in the comments. Every donation counts.

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/13900215

I'm curious what yalls expierence with this is

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/13660667

I got this "binder" recently. I like it better than any one I've had so far (I'd estimate that I've gone through about eight from various brands).

Pros:

-Very breathable, can exercise in it without feeling like death

-Not terrible in hot weather

-Doesn't show under a lot of shirts, though if you have a shirt with a wide neck it'll show, but does look like an undershirt as opposed to a bra since the neck is high.

-Helps with hiding hip fat

-Feels natural. I forget I'm wearing this sometimes. Probably would be fine sleeping in it as well, though it's good practice to take breaks.

Cons:

-If you have a bigger chest this isn't gonna do the best of jobs binding since it's got less compression than a typical binder. It's still not the worst option in that case, but you won't look completely flat. It's worked well for me flatness wise.

-I wouldn't wear this by itself because it doesn't fit like a regular shirt. Definitely looks an undergarment.

-It smells like a McDonald's playground right out of the package. I recommend you add baking soda into the wash to get the smell out faster.

-I suspect this will stretch out the longer I use it. The solution is to dry it on low as opposed to air dry it. It's got cotton in it so it'll shrink.

I recommend you only get it in black or white if your concern is passing. A lot of cis men will wear undershirts (typically in white, sometimes black, but never in nude).

If you're in-between measurements, order a size up. I made the mistake of getting a size down and I wasn't even able to get it over my head. Had to exchange it which took a while.

If you're interested in a binder with flatter coverage I will post a review of the underworks ultimate binder if requested. Underworks is by far my favorite binder brand for many reasons.

I got this "binder" recently. I like it better than any one I've had so far (I'd estimate that I've gone through about eight from various brands).

Pros:

-Very breathable, can exercise in it without feeling like death

-Not terrible in hot weather

-Doesn't show under a lot of shirts, though if you have a shirt with a wide neck it'll show, but does look like an undershirt as opposed to a bra since the neck is high.

-Helps with hiding hip fat

-Feels natural. I forget I'm wearing this sometimes. Probably would be fine sleeping in it as well, though it's good practice to take breaks.

Cons:

-If you have a bigger chest this isn't gonna do the best of jobs binding since it's got less compression than a typical binder. It's still not the worst option in that case, but you won't look completely flat. It's worked well for me flatness wise.

-I wouldn't wear this by itself because it doesn't fit like a regular shirt. Definitely looks an undergarment.

-It smells like a McDonald's playground right out of the package. I recommend you add baking soda into the wash to get the smell out faster.

-I suspect this will stretch out the longer I use it. The solution is to dry it on low as opposed to air dry it. It's got cotton in it so it'll shrink.

I recommend you only get it in black or white if your concern is passing. A lot of cis men will wear undershirts (typically in white, sometimes black, but never in nude).

If you're in-between measurements, order a size up. I made the mistake of getting a size down and I wasn't even able to get it over my head. Had to exchange it which took a while.

If you're interested in a binder with flatter coverage I will post a review of the underworks ultimate binder if requested. Underworks is by far my favorite binder brand for many reasons.

I found this to be helpful. I've been having a lot of anxiety around my voice changing so some sort of info on what to expect made me feel better.

Beatles=Beagles confirmed?

cross-posted from: https://beehaw.org/post/13674539

Join the Trans Housing Network matrix room

If you are having issues finding housing as a trans person or would like to help others, consider joining this new matrix chat room.

Sharing and updoots appreciated.

cross-posted from: https://beehaw.org/post/13674539

Join the Trans Housing Network matrix room

If you are having issues finding housing as a trans person or would like to help others, consider joining this new matrix chat room.

Sharing and updoots appreciated.

Not sure if this is the right community to post this, but I'll give it a shot.

One of my very good friends is planning on going into the Navy in about a year. He's generally a moderate left leaning kinda guy, but is trans. He comes from a navy family which is part of the reason he decided to go in the first place. He's going into mechanics and stuff and not combat which is slightly better I guess, but it's very concerning to me that he's planning on joining especially because he's trans. I also feel that ethically, actively participating in that system is bad.

How can I dissuade him from joining? I don't wanna go full force argument mode because it's ultimately his choice but I would like advice on how to softly nudge him away from it without affecting our friendship negatively. Thanks.