11
submitted 10 months ago by late_night@sopuli.xyz to c/monkeyspaw@sopuli.xyz
top 11 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old

Manned space exploration gets set back by decades as overly cautious medical advisors try to figure out the cause of hair loss in astronauts.

[-] averyminya@beehaw.org 1 points 10 months ago

Hair loss, eh.

Macular degeneration on the other hand :(

[-] otter@lemmy.ca 12 points 10 months ago

Every living creature, from the smallest protists to large elephants, grows lush facial hair. Creatures spend a large part of their days trying to trim it down only for it to grow again.

Since hair takes 1-2 years to decompose, discarded hair continues to build up. Some of it is burned, but that leads to other issues

[-] threelonmusketeers@sh.itjust.works 2 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Sounds like it could be a good carbon capture strategy. Just need to turn it into biochar so it lasts a couple thousand years instead of a couple years.

[-] StephniBefni@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

Please don't, I don't want facial hair

[-] late_night@sopuli.xyz 4 points 10 months ago

I don't make the rules, ma'am

[-] actionjbone@sh.itjust.works 5 points 10 months ago

Granted. Everyone on Earth now owns a Lovesense Lush which grows hair on its face.

[-] baconeater@lemm.ee 3 points 10 months ago
[-] otter@lemmy.ca 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)
signed
- the paw
[-] ArmokGoB@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 10 months ago

Everyone becomes dwarves and are forced to live underground

[-] Metal_Zealot@lemmy.ml 2 points 10 months ago

Everyone's lush facial hair also grows 30x faster than normal

this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2024
11 points (86.7% liked)

The Monkey's Paw

610 readers
1 users here now

Want to make a wish? Just ask the Monkey’s Paw! No strings attached.*

Just create a post that starts with “I wish ___”. Other users will then grant you the wish, and probably not how you intended.

^(*)^ ^Strings^ ^definitely^ ^attached.^ ^Satisfaction^ ^not^ ^guaranteed.^ ^Wish^ ^will^ ^likely^ ^backfire.^

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS