I feel we should return to our pagan roots and sacrifice them at the foot of the tree to stave off the anger of the gods. You don't just go around cutting down fancy trees. That's the kind of nonsense that causes big problems.
The traditional method of Anglo-Saxon human sacrifice was to hang them from a tree, which presents a small problem.
I thought they said there were tree fellers
Damn I lost my shit over this one. Hahahaha class.
Fucking Cumbrians, coming over 'ere, taking our trees!
This is the best summary I could come up with:
Two people have been charged in connection with the felling of the world-famous Sycamore Gap tree.
Daniel Graham, 38, and Adam Carruthers, 31, both from Cumbria, have also been charged with criminal damage to Hadrian's Wall last September.
The men were originally arrested last October and had since been on bail, Northumbria Police said.
The pair are due to appear at Newcastle Magistrates' Court on 15 May.
This breaking news story is being updated and more details will be published shortly.
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The original article contains 116 words, the summary contains 93 words. Saved 20%. I'm a bot and I'm open source!
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