this post was submitted on 14 May 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (7 children)

I picked man over bear because man probably won't eat you. But if gorilla is a choice, that wins. Gorilla is friend as long as you keep your head low and he knows he's the boss. Also don't suprise him.

[–] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (7 children)

because man probably won't eat you.

that's why I dumped my last boyfriend

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[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

cancels surprise birthday party for Koko Jr

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[–] Kase@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

To be clear, I'm not trying to get into a man v bear debate here. But, like, a man could still kill you, right? Is that better than being eaten? I mean, I guess it's probably less likely. I'm no expert on bears or random forest men.

[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Im betting on the fact that humans have baked in altruism. We want to help each other. As a kid I got stuck in the forrest with my dirt bike and a gnarly looking guy helped me get home with his truck. It was a scary experience and it was a risk. I think most people are basically good. Men just have the strength to act on it when they are bad people.

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[–] RandomVideos@programming.dev 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I would choose wolves because i have experience with dogs which are close enough to wolves

I am inexperienced with gorillas or any other primate

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[–] Omgboom@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 year ago

Do I have treats for the wolf?

[–] Kase@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This takes me back to "gorilla, man, gun," which was basically the baptist youth camp version of rock, paper, scissors. (It probably exists outside of that context, that's just where I always played it shrug)

[–] kraftpudding@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (6 children)

How does that work? Gorilla kills man? Gun kills Gorilla? but what's the man/gun outcome? Because gun also kills man

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[–] udon@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Trick question, Wolf is a male surname.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Are we talking a sign language-using gorilla with a pet kitty or...?

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[–] Seraph@kbin.social 5 points 1 year ago

Wolf not wolves? Sure I can use a new pet I guess.

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 year ago

Probably wolf.

[–] lowleveldata@programming.dev 4 points 1 year ago

What? But we can keep the fire running if we have 2 people...

Is there gonna be a loser's bracket for this tournament?

[–] ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

what are you doing out here alone, Moon-moon?

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[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Wolf 100%. It's without its pack and I'd have some chance to fight it off. A gorilla would tear me in half.

[–] Palerider@feddit.uk 3 points 1 year ago

You'd probably have some chance of becoming part of its pack if you were careful.

Or it'd just rip your throat out...

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[–] Willy@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

rabid coyote vs hungry tiger

[–] JoShmoe@ani.social 5 points 1 year ago

With a tiger you’re just defacto dead on first contact.

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (3 children)

HYDROGEN BOMB

VERSUS

COUGHING BABY

GO!!!

cough... cough

massive explosion

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