Self Improvement
A community which focusses on improving yourself. This can be in many different ways - from improving physical health or appearance, to improving mental health, creating better habits, overcoming addictions, etc.
While material circumstances beyond our control do govern much of our daily lives, people do have agency and choices to make, whether that is as "simple" as disciplining yourself to not doomscroll, to as complex as recreating yourself to have many different hobbies and habits.
This is not a place where all we do is talk about improving "productivity" (in a workplace context) and similar terms and harmful lifestyles like "grindset". Self-improvement here is intended to make you a generally better and happier person, as well as a better communist, and any other roles you may have in your life.
Rules and guidelines:
- Posts should be about self-improvement. This is obviously a wide category, and can range from advice, to finding resources, to self-posts about needing to improve in a certain area, or how you have improved, and many other things.
- Use content warnings when discussing difficult subjects.
- Do not make medical decisions solely because of a discussion you have had with any person here (e.g. whether to take or not take medications; diagnoses; etc.) as we do not vet people. All medical problems should be discussed with a real-life medical professional.
- Do not post harmful advice here. If this is seen, then please report it and we shall remove it. If you are unsure about whether it's precisely harmful advice or not but feel uneasy about it, please report it anyway.
- Do not insult other users and their lifestyles or their habits (unless they ask, I suppose). This is a place for self-improvement. Critique and discussion about a course of action is encouraged over shit-flinging. Don't talk down to people.
Same boat, but late 30s. Find meaning outside of work.
Right, I get that sentiment, but working a job that I found downright meaningless broke me to the point where I had zero energy or motivation to do anything meaningful outside of work. I need to see myself somewhat in my work to not feel like I am actively giving myself depression.
Maybe I should have phrased it more in terms of asking for inspiration rather than searching for meaning. I'm essentially someone without a career saying "what careers are even viable for me at this point?"
The whole economy needs to be remade, piece by piece. Once I realized this, it became pretty clear that the game plan was to understand how capitalist businesses/industries work, save money through communal forms of living, and use the proceeds to get communal enterprises off the ground.
I'm not far from you in age and I am very short on credentials, but l have the ability to assess resource flows and inefficiencies in businesses and outline how those might be rectified through workers' cooperative or communal models. It's really not that hard, a well-rounded education at high-school level would give you all the tools you need.
In other words, my career path is communism.
This is where I'm at. I'm 36, I hate my job, but it pays better than most things around here and I don't know how to do anything else. Sinking into my hobbies relieves some of the stress. Most people hate their jobs and I feel lucky to not be mining coal or something that leads to an early grave. I know, as a good communist I should strive for more and rally against the current system. I have in the past, and I would if there was any sort of support system. However, I need to focus on playing the hand I was dealt. Detaching from the "politics" of my job and just let management and coworkers fuck up is helping with my mental state. At the end of the day, I'm just a cog, and if I keep putting out fires behind the scenes, my managers will just keep getting away with it and what's more, they will get the credit for when I "deep state" things to work out well.
I know this isn't the advice that OP was looking for, but there's something to be said for checking out a little and not letting work get to you as bad. As long as your bills are getting paid I guess
Your life is like a mirror to mine. Checking out helped me a lot, but I find it really hard not to care about things I know can be improved and know how to improve, so I always tend to fall back into the work trap again.
Me too. I'm trying to just make peace with it. My window is closing for being able to do anything else
Thanks, lovely idea. You might have missed the part where I'm a humanist devoid of practical skills. Once the free software movement realizes it needs someone really good at analyzing modernist literature, I'm all in
I'm not in the free software movement, though I'm trying to be (my job drains all my will to continue to write code after work). Right now all my externally derived meaning has to come from trying to raise children with as little trauma as possible.
We software people are generally not good at things like that. We are also generally not good at knowing what kinds of software we could write to help you, or people who have done other things you have done. We are also generally not good at writing things that regular people read to understand what we've done.
For real, contributing documentation to otherwise excellent open source software projects would be something really valuable that you could probably do right now.
If you're working with kids and find that meaningful, that seems kinda the most you can hope for. Do that and do book clubs or other intellectually stimulating stuff in your free time. Reduce your hours if you can.
It's more meaningful than what I did before, for sure, and I feel almost ungrateful for wanting out again. But the challenges are both that it is, a lot of the time pretty mind-numbing, involves a lot of conflict and social stuff that is pretty tough on me (social anxiety) and also makes me feel I'll never be really good at it. Add to that the fact that the field faces constant cuts by neoliberal politicians and that the hours, pay and benefits are nearly non-existent, and it just feels a bit like a dead end. Sorry for not explaining that in the OP - writing this stuff out helps me work through my own reasoning though, so thanks
Can you start your own gig teaching children some useful skill in regards to your education? Business administration and distilling your expertise into a curriculum stands to be a lot of brainpower. Like if you had a room where children had to build bridges with popsicle sticks or something similarly hands on learning beyond what the curriculum normally affords them then you have a nice value proposition.
I was at a party for my friend and I was holding pads for him so that he could punch and kick. The kids wanted to join in so I showed them some combos they could throw. Then they got to fight me for a little bit. The parents were all impressed and said that if they could give their kids to me and they come back exhausted a few hours later then it's an awesome business. I feel squeamish about kids because they yearn to hurt themselves, are very emotional, and the idea that they can be exploited makes me want to stay uninvolved.
But setting sail with a friend to do marketing, sales, business admin, organizing, creating a product, finding a space, building out a space, managing a space, and communicating with clients is stimulating work. If you can distill what you learned in school such that it would be valuable to a child then you might have something to contribute.
One immediate piece of advice I can give you is to read Bullshit Jobs, so you can spot the draining and soul-sucking nonsense, and focus in the things that make the job good.
You ever think about civil/environmental engineering and just generally that industry and field of work?
You could become a soils technician, a Water treatment operator, or even an engineer. There are some states that even offer engineering licensure to those without a degree.
It’s a fulfilling field in most cases.
I'm not in the states, but I will for sure consider these kind of options. I really wish I had considered the merits of an engineering degree when I was younger. But I had the classic mathophobia and just went path of least resistance when choosing a field of study.
You don’t really need to be that good at math to be a good civil engineer, it involves a lot more legalese and management skills
Can I ask why you don’t feel intellectually stimulated? And my next question, would you rather make that job intellectually stimulating or find a career that’s a better fit?