iiiiiiitttttttttttt

To be fair, on my work computer, 99% of my issues are related to botched updates running in the background without my knowledge, consent, or input.

Sketchy CMD scripts run in the background, all the fans spin up, then the drivers just randomly give up and bring the whole system down with it.

100% of the issues on my personal system are self inflicted.

I take responsibility for ~2% of the issues on my work system.

"It was working yesterday!" Is my favourite.

Things usually are working right before they stop working.

Why is it that cars breaking down has been normalised as just the natural behaviour of vehicles and then you ask the mechanic for help but computers break down and people act like IT personally came into your office to take a piss through the vent directly onto the motherboard?

Not an IT, a friend onced told me their phone was getting hot and draining battery fast from last night. Naturally I asked if they installed any new apps or changed settings couple of times and the answer was clear no.

I checked the apps list and saw an obviously sus app (might be miner). I asked from when they had that app and they said 'why? I installed it last night'.

That was the kind of app you get clicking 'horny milves in your area' ads.

Can confirm, my home desktop more or less died while I was at work. I'd leave it running 24/7, as I had it set up as something of a simple server for a couple things, namely a remote desktop virtual machine.

So yeah, I didn't touch it when it failed.

Cause: Bad capacitors and a failed chipset fan.

Did you implement a change last night?

No.

Did you implement a change last night?

No.

Did you implement a change last night?

.......Yes

Have you ever walked a trading floor with IT? The horror stories... "That guy didn't know what I meant by CD drive until I showed him and he said 'oh! The coffee mug holder?? '" or "no, really, look, just took a bump right under the desk" or better "under that desk? Had to swap machines.. rotting barf from God knows when"

You say that... but I've seen things stop working on their own all the time

Story time: I've had my work laptop replaced three times in the past two years because of persistent crashes under load. We tried replacing a lot of stuff, uninstalled all kinds of software etc., nothing helped. Turns out they'd remotely installed some utility about five years ago that controls fan speeds. That has been installed on each new machine because it was in my profile. When I checked, I found out that this thing hadn't been updated in three years and was likely not compatible with my current hardware. Uninstalled it, never had problems since. So yeah, that was fun. At least I got a new laptop out of it.

You didn't change anything?

No.

Where do you use it?

On my lap in the den.

When was the last time you vacuumed?

???

(Time to disassemble and apply compressed air...)

Just put in a ticket. SLA is 3 days, see you in 2 weeks, but only because your boss got involved. God I hate the IT department.