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[-] Kachilde@lemmy.world 116 points 1 year ago
[-] DeathWearsANecktie@lemm.ee 103 points 1 year ago

Lmao that's the grin of a person who has no regrets

[-] TWeaK@lemm.ee 14 points 1 year ago

Did she at least get dressed before the mugshot?

[-] Fraylor@lemm.ee -1 points 1 year ago

Doesn't look like it. Idk if their policy is to give standard issue before or after the mugshot. Not that it makes it right, but I could see someone thinking "hurr says on the paper they don't get nuffin!" When the person who wrote that likely wasn't thinking about nude mugshots.

[-] Stamets@startrek.website 71 points 1 year ago

The men, Luke and John are used to people being rude, slamming doors, and even yelling at them, but for a naked woman to greet them at the door, that was quite the shock. Neither one had seen a woman naked before and they didn’t quite know how to respond. Not to mention the strange erotic sensations they were feeling for the first time as well. It was quite obvious that their message was not going to be heard at this particular house and that it was time to move on to the next one.

When the men went to return to their bikes, Brandy wasn’t yet done trying to get under their skin. A nude Brandy started speaking of her vagina and the “Devil’s” magic it contained. “Take a good look at my p*ssy. Succumb to my devil vagina magic”. This got the attention of the pair of men. They began to fear what may happened next and began to pedal away.

I'm not trying to be witty or doing this for comedic purposes, but Jesus Christ... I've only ever seen this meme. I've never looked into the article. That being said it is slightly hilarious that the author decided to add that bit about never seeing someone naked before and then "strange erotic sensations".

[-] seitanic 86 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It makes more sense when you look at the rest of site. It's a "satire" news site. It's not a real story.

I thought "That doesn't sound like something a real journalist would write", and sure enough... Scroll down to the bottom, and you find

KVTA4 is a fabricated satirical newspaper and comedy website. KVTA4 uses invented names in all its stories, except in cases when public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental.

[-] DarkThoughts@kbin.social 18 points 1 year ago

Who would even believe:

Not to mention the strange erotic sensations they were feeling for the first time as well.

That's straight up erotic fan fiction. lol

[-] GeneralVincent@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Yeah I got to that point and was a little disappointed tbh, I wanted this to be true lol

[-] Nahvi@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Their motto at the top, "News you can count on to let you down"

[-] GeneralVincent@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Damn, I missed that too haha

[-] MrsDoyle@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

It seemed fake when they said two young men on bicycles. That’s more Morman style. In my experience JWs are an older, very conservative looking lady with a “FML” child in tow carrying copies of The Watchtower.

[-] seitanic 4 points 1 year ago

I once had a roommate who was a JW, and after he moved out we kept getting JW missionaries at our door for weeks afterwards. It was just like you described. They take a child with them to deter people from being rude.

[-] WillFord27@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Am I the only one completely exhausted with "satire" news? We have enough misinformation as it is, and now we know how dangerous it can be. It's not funny anymore.

[-] seitanic 10 points 1 year ago

When it's done well, it's great. I love The Onion. The problem is people writing stories that look like real news and then pretending that it's satire.

[-] TheAndrewBrown@lemm.ee 6 points 1 year ago

It’s one thing when the site is obviously satire but they’re clearly trying to appear as a real news site. It’s so unnecessary

[-] seitanic 2 points 1 year ago

It's necessary to get them clicks.

[-] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 6 points 1 year ago

So you're saying I shouldn't purchase this Jehovah's witnesses costume?

[-] Stamets@startrek.website 1 points 1 year ago

Well, the Witnesses got what they want because THANK GOD

[-] TWeaK@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

This makes me want to watch Orgazmo again.

[-] seitanic 16 points 1 year ago

It's also not a real news story, so there's that.

[-] frogfruit@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 year ago

KVTA4 is a fabricated satirical newspaper and comedy website. KVTA4 uses invented names in all its stories, except in cases when public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental.

[-] chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 year ago

Knew something was wrong when it mentioned bicycles. That's not really a JW thing, though maybe some are doing it since I left.

[-] newthrowaway20@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

This makes more sense. Thank you.

[-] JokeDeity@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago

Every article these days feels like it was written by AI trained on nothing but Christian centrists.

[-] Mirodir@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 year ago

The hover-text on the picture is "VMAGIC". Whoever was responsible for that must've had one hell of a giggle.

[-] dipshit@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago
[-] Phoenix3875@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Wait, that's not the Jehova I remembered.

[-] dipshit@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

No, but it’s the Jehova we deserved.

[-] Hyperreality@kbin.social 21 points 1 year ago

If these men are allowed to spread the word of God, why wasn't she allowed to spread the word of Vagina Magic?

[-] Bearbi3@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago
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[-] RIP_Cheems@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago

Unholy, but approved

[-] bappity@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago

wait for Halloween and knock on their doors see how they like it when you're playing at their own game

[-] Colour_me_triggered@lemm.ee 16 points 1 year ago

I'm having a really shitty day and this just made me smile.

[-] Anonymousllama@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

Need more JPEG

[-] cricket97@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Haha sexual harassment is so funny when a quirky woman does it

[-] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 21 points 1 year ago

Exactly. This is America. She should've shot them for trespassing.

[-] atrielienz@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

So funny because it didn't actually happen. It's satire.

[-] Luke_Fartnocker@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago

Everything on the Internet is true.

[-] Gabu@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago
[-] Luke_Fartnocker@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago

Isn't that what she was trying to do?

[-] Leviathan@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Nah she was just trying to share her religion.

[-] Arthur_Leywin@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

It's deserved when they spread a religion of hate.

[-] cricket97@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

should you be allowed to rape someone if they "spread a religion of hate"?

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[-] HubertManne@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago

This was funny but its been a bit overdone.

[-] seitanic 4 points 1 year ago

It's a fake story, so it was never funny.

[-] HubertManne@kbin.social 8 points 1 year ago

I really don't look to memes for information. They are more like cartoons to me.

[-] MargotRobbie@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

The good old "Wolf of Wall Street" tactic. Sure brings back memories.

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this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2023
609 points (93.4% liked)

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