Too Afraid To Ask

I have seen numerous psychologists and therapists get their backs up about people even saying "I'm depressed" or "I've been depressed lately" - and they'll quickly jump in to say "YOU ARE SAD. DEPRESSION IS A MEDICAL CONDITION - HAVE YOU BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH DEPRESSION? No? THEN YOU'RE SAD, NOT DEPRESSED" - so I personally steer clear of any and all self-diagnosis. I am not a doctor - I can only accurately describe my symptoms, not the cause or condition.

I have friends who actually are autistic

Then ask them, not pseudonymous randos on the internet.

Claiming to have a mental health condition to explain another health condition in order to be taken seriously seems bad form to me. If autism actually explains remarkable traits or deficits or challenges that are lifelong and consistent that ADHD doesn't, then go for it. Otherwise the onus is on you to express your needs vis-a-vis support and challenges and perhaps enlighten people with the knowledge what ADHD is and how it impacts people. We don't need to further muddy the waters with bad information around these conditions.

I don't exactly fit the bar for autism, I'm wayyyyy too outgoing and sociable(?)

It's a myth that autistic people can't be sociable or outgoing.

You could say you haven't been formally diagnosed but fit some criteria for it.

You could just say you have ADHD since you actually know you have it. But as far as autism goes it's complex and the internet fucking sucks as a diagnostic resource so you'll probably have to ask a doctor or other autistic people. It seems like all of the "blog" sites that list autism criteria are geared toward children and right now I wouldn't fit most of them and for the rest I wouldn't have thought I fit if I hadn't had people pointing out how socially awkward I am, but in early childhood it was way more obvious. Also being outgoing and sociable doesn't rule it out. Although I also think it's best not to focus on or overthink labels in general unless you really need it to get some sort of support or to help people understand you better as an alternative to getting rejected from life.

yeah, you should check out raads-r, I would think that it's okay to say "I'm probably autistic"

my gf is diagnosed and she says I'm very autistic so I wouldn't be surprised if I was too

Well, if you're feeling like you're faking something, you should take a look at the stats for suicides and depression for self-diagnosed vs clinically diagnosed. Very close. If you're considering self-diagnosis you're in danger of something. Not an amazingly useful stat, as people having a hard time with various issues might get some misinfo and self-identify. Still have a higher rate of that stuff in the first place for obvious reasons. The lack of care for anyone who misses childhood diagnosis and getting actually effective treatment sucks. People needing to resort to self-diagnosis is a systematic failure, cobbling together information about what to do with yourself afterward is not easy alone, sounds like you have some people to ask about it a bit though.

Don't pay attention to personality quiz types in video form. Research all the symptoms. Sensory and even digestive stuff.

Autism is very fashionable these days so claiming the label if you haven't been diagnosed seems a bit pretentious, though of course nothing really stops you. Apparently the main diagnostic markers involve your behaviour when you were a little kid, as opposed to whether you're sociable or whatever in the present. I don't know what benefits (if any) exist to being diagnosed, but if you try to get that, the clinicians will probably want to interview your parents abour your childhood, if they can.

ADHD can be treated with meds but autism is untreatable afaik. You're better off without autism.