Hexphoenix

I used to work right next to a plasma donation place. I had too much bloodwork done as a kid, now the only way I'd consent to having a significant amount of blood taken from me is if a doctor said "if we don't take this blood you are literally going to die." And even then I'd think about it for a bit.

Photoshop, probably

Imagine getting so mad about a giant buttplug that you physically attack someone

I'm pretty sure the artist wins this round, "someone punched me in the face for erecting an 80ft tall buttplug" is a story you can't beat

What is it with people named McAfee being absolutely unhinged

I'll vote for you but only if the pork is made of

It looks like what an AI would come up with if you told it you wanted a wasp that was also a deer

Kindergarteners are more dangerous than hornets, let me see you try that on a kid before talking shit

Sushi is kinda treated as a catch-all in American parlance, just like sake.

Fun fact: sake just means "booze" in Japanese. It is a catchall. Bud light is sake

Noodles? Woke.

Pay attention now - pasta? Not woke.

This is why I fast. Can't be gay with no calories for gay activities

Fuck AI and also AIs

I'm into AIs (alien impalas)

After the researchers recorded this, they played it back, then he excitedly flew over, thinking he just heard another ʻōʻō bird.

Awwwwww come on I didn't need to know that