owwma balls
slugma grindset
yeah, the distro is Mint
here, try it in your browser - https://distrosea.com/start/linuxmint-22.1-cinnamon/
How old is your abandonware?
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DOS - DOSBox works on Linux, it'll be exactly the same
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Early windows / win32 - WINE works incredibly well, you just install it and then it can run Windows. File menus will end up a bit goofy because they try to point you at My Documents instead of ~
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Early 2000s compatibility dead zone - There's like a 60% chance it still works on Windows and a 70% chance it works on Linux through WINE.
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Post dead zone - WINE works incredibly well again.
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Modern games and Steam games - Proton works incredibly well and you'll barely notice you're using it.
We made a pun reminding you of that time a country gave you a personal jet and about how you have your own private mansion. I bet you feel SOOOO owned right now.
It depends on a lot of factors, many of them 
Oh no, I tried to google these in case they actually meant something, and got nothing
I'm gonna go delete my post out of shame lol
Hello [account holder name] from [account holder town], I'm [name of character] from the hit series [whatever you're watching]. When I'm not busy [plot of thing] I enjoy using [product]. [product]! It's [slogan]!
Scientists should've went with the 50 planets approach for a while, then people would be relieved when they decide to axe ice boi.
make yourself gnomn
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What? None of those games are Master Of Orion.