[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 1 points 14 hours ago

It's not like we're constantly at odds with each other as well, normally I'd go to her bed, or she'd come to mine for a while before I sleep to "get them cuddles" as you put it.

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Oh well, 7 years too late for me lmao

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

We are both Asian.

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

My god, the amount of language I have to learn is monumental it seems

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

I worked night shift for a year or two, that is indeed why we started sleeping in separate bedrooms. Right now, our schedule is still a 1-2 hours apart, enough for us to want to sleep in separate bedrooms.

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 14 points 2 days ago

I have dated exactly 1 (one) girl. I am her first relationship as well. Maybe we just don't know what is normal lmao

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

Sam the Lemon Boy? Is that you?

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago

Haha, our city has a much lower crim rate than London actually.

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

She's not normally like this, and yes Ubers usually drop people off right at the entrance of our apartment. Aside from Uber, she would also take the bus or train into the city, both of which requre a five minute walk through our neighborhood which she has no problem doing.

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 26 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

It's pretty safe where we live afaik, also CCTV is everywhere here especially in and around the big cities.

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Context: I got the text but that the time, she didn't know when she'd get home so I was waiting on a follow up tesxt with the time she'd be home (again, my bad for not making sure I can hear them), and we live in a pretty safe country, where even robbery is rare.

136
submitted 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) by RyanLiu@lemmy.world to c/nostupidquestions@lemmy.world

Today, before taking an Uber home, she sent me a text wanting me to be downstairs on the street to greet her as the Uber arrives. I read it and told her that yes, I'll be there. I didn't notice any further text because I was in the middle of something.

Later, I hear the door opening and went to our door to greet her, she was furious and refused to talk to me. I realized I forgot to turn my phone back from silent mode after work today. I told her that it is my bad, she still refused to talk to me. At this point, things are still normal for our relationship, she would usually become willing to talk after a while.

I usually go to sleep at 22:30 and she knows, so I thought we'd sort things out tomorrow and went to bed. I woke up in the middle of the night (later I found out it was 1a.m.) to her standing next to my bed (we sleep in separate bedrooms), and she began asking a series of pointed questions: "What would you do if you found out that I was gone?", "What would you do if the CCTV on our street is broken by chance?", "What would you tell my mother if I went missing?", "If I was actually kidnapped, would you kill the guy for me?"

You know, the usual. I thought she's just angry at me still and wanted to vent, so I went along with her for the time being: "I'd be very worried and look for you everywhere", "I'd sue the city", "I'd tell your mother exactly what happened and say I'm sorry", and "I'd kill the guy who kidnapped you".

She grumbled and asked a few follow-up questions, like "if you're planning to kill the guy, what would you do with our cat?" But at this point, I think she's finding it difficult to stay angry at me. I tell her again that I'm sorry I missed her text, and that next time this happens, she should just call me to make sure I see her text, but she left soon after without acknowledging my apology.

I know I'm in the wrong for missing her text. Not trying to argue otherwise. My question is, am I really responsible if someone kidnaps her between getting off the Uber and getting into our apartment complex? Is she trying to guilt trip me into thinking her anger is justified or am I really a horrible, kidnap-facilitating bad person for missing a few texts?

Edit for context: we live in a pretty safe city that ranks top 10 in the world on low crime rate. Also, thank you all for educating me on what gaslighting actually means. It was 2 in the morning when I posted this, I did not have the energy to find the answer myself.

[-] RyanLiu@lemmy.world 10 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Swazdo-lah, friend!

4
Nice bunkbed! (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago by RyanLiu@lemmy.world to c/cat@lemmy.world
10
Not Michelle! (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by RyanLiu@lemmy.world to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
2
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by RyanLiu@lemmy.world to c/cat@lemmy.world

Girl in the pic is 160cm tall for reference.

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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by RyanLiu@lemmy.world to c/illegallysmolcats@lemmy.world

He's 6 years old now and still likes to sit on my feet, he just can't fit as well anymore.

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RyanLiu

joined 1 year ago