Are you aware of lemmy.world blocking VPN connections? Might be the reason you aren't able to post most of the time.

Der hat es aber gut gemeint. Meiner hatte auch irgendein Problem mit mir, aber was genau hat er mir natürlich nicht gesagt. Diese Wortkargheit immer. Am Ende war er so genervt, der hat ganz aufgehört mit mir zu reden, mir dann noch die Tür vor der Nase zugeknallt. Habe immer wieder versucht ihm gut zuzureden und das Problem an der Wurzel zu packen, aber er war einfach eingeschnappt. Letzlich konnten wir uns erst einigen als ich ihm als Versöhnung das neueste Scheiben Bild angeboten habe. Jetzt wagen wir einen Neuanfang, ich habe auch versprochen mich zu bessern. Diese Beziehungsprobleme...

Ich spar mir das Wasser und dreh nur noch den Bass auf, genauso erfrischend

Im on 0.27.2, more likely VPN issue

Same here!

Sort of weird, but that sounds like a really great place to be, doesn't it!?

Maybe some of the situations you experienced are what causes stress/anxiety in a similar way, which makes it harder to talk. You might find answers to it once you dig deeper into that topic. The only advice I can give you in all of this is to take your time with it, or better put: give yourself the time you need, it's the most important part... I'm often super slow with understanding where things come from, how they affect me and so on. I think it's a good sign you came here to ask, a first step in the right direction, so to speak.

I've been occupying my mind with plants a lot a few years ago and found geometry in all the leaves and blossoms particularily interesting. Also, botanical names is a whole topic by itself. The pronounciation or words in general surprisingly often fit the "character" of the plants pretty well :)

yeah, sounds familiar. I'd also say it's completely different than other situations where I'm usually lost for words, for instance if I need to react spontaneusly, delayed processing and such.

There are some things I just can't find the right words for and/or not being able to articulate any of the words that would express what I have in my head, even though I have a conception of what to say. For me it's about expressing emotions too. So I would begin 1, 2 words starting a sentence and then... no chance finishing it.

Usually my brain starts spinning quite intensely in these situations with either memories of similar past situations and thoughts about how to express what I'm trying to say, (kinda like overstimulation in mental images/thoughts leading to me not being able to think about what to actually do) or just turning completely blank, both in my head and verbally. Eye contact, definitely no.

I gave up on it over the years with people around me and avoid these topics and situations. However, my last therapist helped me a lot in this regard, as she always gave me the time I needed to find back to being able to speak again when it happened. Sometimes I sat there completely blank for minutes, just staring outside the window or at the walls, feeling panicky and the need to just jump up and leave the room. I actually did once, but felt really bad about it after as she was such a calm person that I usually always felt safe with. After that incident, and over time I learned to try and rephrase the initial sentence or try to express something else connected to the feeling I wanted to talk about, learning how to navigate the situation. So I guess there's a possibility to make some progress.

Great tip, thanks, I tend to overlook that option. My local library does offer audiobooks indeed but as I don't reside in a english-speaking country I highly doubt it would be available.

Discord, definitely!! It might be hard to ditch but it's worth trying. I was never a big fan of it so it was kinda easy yet I still miss being able to contact some people on there. But the more people continue using it, the harder it will be to change things.

Spotify and Chromium, I agree on both as well. Try the options mentioned above concerning Spotify. And yeah, Music streaming is a hard one... I have a dedicated mobile device for Music streaming platforms of this kind if I feel the itch as well as a modded ipod for on the go. Besides that using Bandcamp on a seperate user profile on a Pixel with Graphene OS, no Google stuff installed however and it works pretty great. Highly recommend getting into a habit of buying Music (digital/physical) and listening stuff you actually own on desktop. Simple cmus or sth will do the job.

Maybe Librewolf or other Firefox fork for Browser.

Edit: typo. Edit 2: I'd keep a chromium-based Browser of some sort, you might need it sometime for something. Just use different Browsers for different things.

This feels so true. Modern day version maybe. Always been drawn towards spiritual things and the amount of dark stuff I trigger in others is crazy. It's been a journey to understand and accept. But it's good doing some healing, for others and myself.

Which are the places you buy your Tshirts etc. from? I found buying Merch/Band-Shirts (men's) a good source for heavy weight 100% cotton T's and Longsleeves. Hoodies too sometimes if you're lucky, but it can be extremely difficult to find the same quality in Hoodies. I always start sweating like crazy in synthetic kind, feeling so uncomfortable I can't think straight. Same for jogging pants and gym wear.