i would like to correct myself. I've spoke to drag, and drag is not a roleplayer. Since my point of view on pronouns and one's identity in general was incarrect and disproven by @chocosoldier@lemmy.blahaj.zone, i stand corrected, and want the maximum of people who had similar way of thinking to my own, to doubt their argumentation one more time. While drag's pronouns might sound weird for you grammatically, it could and should exist and be accepted by you if you consider yourself a part of queer community.

hey fam i was raised as a white dude in a still-segregated pocket of the US, i totally understand about culture giving us biases and bigotries and having to recognize and contend with that. deprogramming isn't easy and i respect you for having come this far.

i'd say that the very idea that anyone else has a say in who you are is antithetical to the aims of the queer rights movement because we struggle to live authentically in accordance with who know we are in spite of who and what society tells us we are or must be. i am a trans woman, it is a part of who and what i am and always has been and no amount of 'disagreement' from anyone (including myself, i was in denial for decades) can ever change that. moreover it is a scientific fact that it is important to my mental health that this immutable internal identity is acknowledged and accepted by those around me regardless of whether i put on a satisfactory display of arbitrary gender tropes. i did not wake up one day and decide this for myself, it simply is and i have no choice but to abide what is true, or go back to torturing myself living what i know is a lie.

i don't expect cis people to get my identity. how even could they? but i don't need them to. what i need, again not "i want" but what the facts of human psychology dictate that i need in order to be mentally healthy, is for people to accept that my identity is what it is and go along with it. does it seem ridiculous to me? hell, i seem ridiculous to a lot of people!

i don't get drag's gender either. i don't get grail's. i have thoughts and opinions, who wouldn't? but that's not relevant. whether i get it isn't relevant. what i think or opine about it isn't relevant. the bar isn't getting it, the bar is accept people. the bar is not scrutinizing and making judgment calls about what you think should or shouldn't be a valid gender or pronoun, or worse spinning a narrative where this person doesn't really deserve to have their identity acknowledged.

this whole thing boils down to whether people are willing to respect someone's purported identity even if it seems silly to them, and that's the absolute core of trans rights.