this post was submitted on 13 May 2026
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A Boring Dystopia
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This is the same vibe as "go hand out your resume in person". I'm old enough to remember when most people didn't have dial up. Things have changed.
I’m an elder millennial that has and continues to do all of this shit they are saying in other comments, I still meet more new people regularly that I actually want to talk to again through dating apps. Third spaces are dead and people have over the past 10ish years stopped being interested in expanding their circle by happenstance. I’ll even admit to this myself.
In general we don’t trust each other, and there’s a very real chance that any person you meet could be a fascist even in left leaning cities. This has understandably made women especially more leery of the men they meet even when men are explicitly feminist because the men that hate women lie about their beliefs exacerbating the underlying problems even more.
People don’t understand that we’re not just experiencing political and economic collapse, the culture we all grew up learning how to live in no longer exists. This is a symptom of that
He gave a couple good ideas, join a service group, take Salsa lessons, go to local events. There's a tree planting event in my community this week. You won't meet people if you go once, but if you keep going people will recognize you. This is called "making friends" and sometimes that leads to romance. Things in your community still happen like the olden days.
Sounds like you have some experience here. Would you like to share more about it? How long have you been doing this? How many dates has this resulted in? How many relationships?
Well, I'm married so it worked at some point. I'm involved with my community and the community is your dating pool. The other guy is right in a sense, it's mainly coupled people you meet at events but the more people you meet the more people meet you. You have to make friends before you make lovers. My wife and I have absolutely tried setting up people we've met with people we know. My personal opinion is that people who "never meet anyone" are probably assholes and people steer clear of them.
Okay well you didn't answer any of my questions.
How long ago was that?
i actively volunteer for the past ten years. single people dont' go to these things. it's all married people. making friends doesn't lead to romance, it leads to making friends with people who have no interest in dating you because they are already coupled.
it's also time your spending not pursuing romance, which means less time for that. dating takes a lot of time and effort. it's not magic, it's more like exercise. yo uahve to be constantly exercising to stay in shape, and you have to be constantly dating and pursuing romance if you want romantic life.