Ask Lemmygrad

I am not very good at this, when I say our democracy is not democratic they said I sound insane

I would say a simple litmus test with "democracy" for somebody individualism-brained is, "Are your interests being represented? When you have a complaint with how things are run, what is it like bringing it up and will it get listened to?" If their interests generally are getting represented and the process for getting complaints dealt with is robust, in a liberal "democracy", it's likely that either you're talking to someone who is among the exploiting classes and so isn't likely to be moved by your criticisms of it, or they are thinking of trivial window dressing complaints rather than important needs.

In other words, getting to the heart of "what is the point of a democracy?" If it does not generally represent the people's critical needs and seek to empower them, then what is the point of it? Growing up in a liberal "democracy" can at times have an odd sort of glorification of process that goes on. "You have a right to vote, on X day you write down your vote, on Y day representatives get elected." But what does this mean if it doesn't translate to positive outcomes for people?

A misguided conclusion might be "well I guess democracy is bad then" and indeed some people living in liberal "democracies" end up drawing that conclusion. But that's part two and that gets into who owns the means of production and where power derives from and for whose interests; why it is that the so-called democratic systems of capitalism don't bend toward representing the needs of regular people. If they think liberal "democracy" is good and they're among the more exploited classes, something is going wrong in how they think about it and what their standards are.