No Stupid Questions
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Don't take this the wrong way, but it's probably arrogance. You have things to say, and you feel that your desire to say them is more important than other people's desire to not listen.
Nothing wrong with that, it's human nature, but you can become a better person by learning that it's a privilege to communicate with people, and that your opinions aren't any more valuable than anybody else's.
Humble yourself. Listen more than you speak.
How could someone 'not take that the wrong way?' Mate, that's a hell of a rude leap right there, and I'd never just assume that shizzle.
Fact is that internet structures (as with all other aspects of civ life) are filled with people inordinately 'drunk upon their little bit of power,' who tend to enjoy the trip of using it for their own ends, not strictly because of whatever the place is nominally supposed to be about, and how it's supposed to be moderated.
That all said, it's entirely possible that OP has indeed engaged in toxic behavior in such places, just that so far they we don't know about such?
Anyway, like others here have suggested, here's a recco to just treat all this stuff as mainly a big bag of us casuals interacting. Very few people are putting much on the line or risking their reputations, so it's probably good to think of all this as consisting of a healthy proportion of fun, casual bullshit talked amongst a big group of strangers, each from their own situations, with their own motivations & priorities.
Altho, yes-- for sure, to me, one of the AWESOME things about our collective group chats are the number of functional experts and fascinating people, contributing to our talk. And me, I'm not fully off of Reddit, but the 'Reddit experience' (which now includes The Fediverse) in general has seriously leveled me up in all kinds of ways. (bah, as long as I don't doom-scroll, godamit...)
Ok
We all have our basic reactions, s'all good.