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Update: Charlie Kirk has died after shooting at Utah event, suspect not in custody (www.deseret.com)

submitted 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) by theangriestbird@beehaw.org to c/usnews@beehaw.org

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[–] spit_evil_olive_tips@beehaw.org 21 points 5 months ago (4 children)

Jezebel, 2 days ago: We Paid Some Etsy Witches to Curse Charlie Kirk (archive link)

So, did my Etsy curses work? Time will tell. The forces move in mysterious ways, and as the Priestess reminded me, “Spellwork is a collaboration between the caster, the client, and the universe itself.” For now, we can only trust in the timing of the great unknown.

well, uhh...I've been an atheist my whole life, but I guess this is my "road to Damascus" moment. I'm off to the bookstore to see if they have any used copies of Wiccanism For Dummies.

[–] theangriestbird@beehaw.org 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)

holy shit that is next level. Also makes me wonder how many of these "curses" never actually bear fruit?

[–] spit_evil_olive_tips@beehaw.org 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Mariners’ 32-run 3-win streak sparks talk of fan’s ‘curse-lifting’ with an Etsy witch

Steven Blackburn of Lake Stevens joked on social media that he had hired a witch on Etsy to lift a curse on the team.

He said he never expected anything to come of it, but the Mariners went on to score 28 runs in just two days after his request.

based on the available evidence, Etsy witches are 2 for 2 with a 100% success rate.

[–] TehPers@beehaw.org 5 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

based on the available evidence, Etsy witches are 2 for 2 with a 100% success rate.

As far as I can tell (without searching online), this is all the data we have available. Therefore, I think we can safely say that these curses and whatever work.

Sadly our HOA bans candles (connected properties), otherwise I'd be buying some stuff online right now.

[–] Marshezezz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 5 months ago

The candles and theatrics are helpful for staying focused and keeping your mind on the task and not wandering but the occult can be practiced without anything but your mind and imagination. The occult practices are essentially Zen Buddhism but done with western symbolism because that’s usually what we are raised on in our early formative years so our subconscious responds to it more easily.

[–] t3rmit3@beehaw.org 8 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

And there I was, in the year of our Lord 2025, staring at my computer, chatting with a witch on Etsy about the state of the world, hoping that somewhere between the cosmos and the internet, justice would be served.

The next day, the Priestess sent me her proof of cast: a photograph in flames, the edges slowly curving inward, engulfing Charlie’s ridiculous scrunched-up little face. She whispered (I imagine), “Trust the unseen.” Chills.

Dang, this should definitely go on that witch's LinkedIn!

[–] Five@slrpnk.net 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Now, is it ethical to curse a man I’ve never met? Probably not. But is it unethical to let him keep talking? Yes. So here we are, in the gray area.

I want to make it clear, I’m not calling on dark forces to cause him harm. I just want him to wake up every morning with an inexplicable zit.

There's some serious whiplash reading this article alongside finding out the news.

[–] t3rmit3@beehaw.org 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Clearly the witch did not share her sense of restraint.

[–] Powderhorn@beehaw.org 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I don't think the requested curse was shibari.

[–] t3rmit3@beehaw.org 1 points 5 months ago

Or maybe the 'bari' just got blurred

[–] remington@beehaw.org 6 points 5 months ago

I wrote The Encounter which describes a very unusual event when I was attending college...the entire area was rife with Wiccans.

[–] OneRedFox@beehaw.org 4 points 5 months ago

Damn, never doubt their power.