this post was submitted on 14 Jul 2026
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No Stupid Questions

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Title. I miss my dad, this sucks.

Edit: Thanks guys, grief is a wild ride.

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[–] naught101@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

I haven't had a parent die, but a close friend. As others have said, it sucks, it's hard, it comes in waves. Gradually the waves fade into ripples that just become part of who you are.

Long term, one of the things that helped me most with grieving is the Mexican concept of the three deaths, which I picked up initially through the Pixar film Coco. The idea is basically that people live on beyond physical death in the memories of others. To me this isn't all that different to normal memories of living people (that you haven't seen in a while). Those people still influence the thoughts and emotions and actions of the people who knew them, and in that way they continue to be part of the living world.

Idk, it doesn't change the fact that they are gone, but it makes it also feel like they are still here in a way that means the love that existed before is still here too.