I have tried therapy on and off for a while now. People would always get frustrated with me and tell me to "get therapy," but I never knew what I was actually supposed to be there for. And I tried a service like BetterHelp before (can't remember what this one was called), but it just sucked ass and I'm not sure if the people on there were even licensed professionals.
I finally started going consistently with this one therapist, but I frequently get frustrated with her for not giving me actual coping skills or techniques. One of her favorite things to ask me is "how can you deal with X?" And I get frustrated and say "I don't know." Because if I fucking knew I wouldn't be in therapy. She seems to do a more meandering talk therapy style thing with vague ideas of DBT and CBT thrown in there. She's not giving me enough skills to not get fired at work. She helped me go through a difficult time, but now that that's over, I'm back to square one.
So I found a therapist who specifically states she does DBT. Over time I have learned that my core issue is emotional dysregulation which is treated by DBT. She told me she follows this one workbook. I got the book. It's great! It gives you a zillion and one coping skills. But after having several sessions with her, I notice that she spends the entire time just going "in chapter 4, this happens. Then in chapter 8, this happens" while my eyes just glaze over. Today the session ended 35 minutes early because she only vaguely contributed to me talking about a problem I had today.
I have been seeing both therapists concurrently until my deductible resets in January.
I just am so endlessly frustrated with the entire mental health industry. I've seen so many different therapists. I've really tried to do any exercises that they have given me. I've tried multiple different psych meds (trying a new one now actually!).
Nothing works. Nothing has changed about me. I'm the same person with the same problems. And nothing I seem to try makes a lick of difference. I try so hard. I try a zillion different things...exercise, getting good sleep, eating right, therapy, meds...nothing changes me. Nothing helps me.
What in the everliving fuck am I missing? Do I have to go through 30 different therapists before I can find one that can help me? Am I just doing therapy "wrong"??? What am I supposed to be doing here?
Through all this, I've found that telling someone to "go to therapy" is almost offensive...it just absolves others from caring about you and makes it sound like you're not willing to do the base effort in bettering yourself.
Sorry for the long post and thanks for taking the time to read.
Here's something that a lot of people don't talk about while they go on and on about how everyone should be in therapy and how great it is:
A clinical psychologist has a doctorate in psychology. They have hands on training.
They are expensive.
A social worked or a nurse or anyone else does not.
IMO it's a complete waste of time getting therapy from anyone who isn't a psychologist.
Maybe you should use the time you aren't 'wasting' on Google, because this is incorrect.
Licensing is local. Your state or country will set the requirements to get licensed to practice under a 'protected designation' (as Licensed Therapist, Registered Clinical Social Worker, etc.).
Sometimes this requires a Master's level degree, sometimes a Doctorate.
In North America at least, supervised training happens for all Mental Health professionals at the Master's Level. Usually hundreds of hours to accompany formal examination. This separate from licensing.
The exact number changes locally, but licensing usually requires even more at-work supervision, they usually have two or more levels, you move from provisional to full after you have enough supervised hours as a licensed professional. A process that takes years.
This isn't why you would go to someone with a Doctorate. That level is about specialization or research. If you have treatment-resistent depression, for example, you might need someone with special training or experience.
They will all be just as expensive, but that's because the US treats health as a paid privilege.
Yeah I have thought about that before. But since my insurance doesn't kick in until I've met a whipping $3k deductible, I've been very hesitant to try something like that. Therapy isn't covered with a copay with my insurance. I have to pay the full amount until it kicks in. I think my plan is to keep using the old therapist but utilize the skill building book my second therapist recommended to supplement me.
I'm not sure if bad therapy is better than no therapy - could be. Might not be.