So I mistakingly thought the grove with the tiefling-goblin war was the main quest, because that's what the game kept talking about.
And I didn't see any way to continue the game outside of doing it, especially since the way North to do Wyll's quest to get Kalrath was blocked off by a broken bridge. I eventually learned I could jump it, but I honestly didn't think platforming was an option given that the game didn't seem to have platforming elements.
I got stuck in the Goblin Camp on a really tough fight, as due to the game pointing me in that direction I went there without gearing up or leveling my guys, so I was only level four.
Honestly the fights were fine except for the one against Dror Hazlin, who kept killing my guys in one hit and refusing to take damage no matter what I did.
I tried attacking him from the rafters, but he was only half-way down on his health by the time he had my guys cornered and proceeded to kill them all by knocking them off the rafters.
I eventually turned down the difficulty, but found the fight unsatsifying. So I reloaded and eventually figured I could shove Dror Ragzlin down a bit and miss out on his worm.
I chose that, because the shame of using Explorer Difficult was just too great.
So, you might be wondering "What's the problem? I found a solution"
Well I was talking to the Steam Message boards about it and they were overly toxic, accusing me of a being a troll, telling me how easy the fight was, giving non-answers like "Use Explosive Barrles" (I don't have any) or "Hire some ogres!" (There are none around)
and when I explained why their solutions were unviable I was told I was a ragebaiter.
I just kept getting told how easy the fight was and how I'm a terrible person for asking for help.
Eventually the forum post was deleted due to how out of hand it got.
It left me in too sour a mood, because I figured, what if they're right? What if I'm not gamer enough to properly enjoy Baldur's Gate 3.
So now I ask on Lemmy, should I continue, or uninstall in shame?
I really do like the game, I don't agree with every mechanic and I dislike how limited resoruces are, but I love the world and the story and would really like to see it through to the end.
If you think I should continue, then please, I ask any advice I can get for how to optimize enjoyment. Thank you.
Play whatever difficulty you find okay for you. Anyone telling you your chosen difficulty is too easy can go take a hike.
If you like the game you can reload an earlier save and redoit. I'm on my first run too, and just like you I went straight to the goblin camp on act 1. The Dror fight was also the only challenging one, and eventually I beat it with some strategic thinking. I was level 4 when I managed to get it right, however, had I figured out the strategy I'm sure I could have beat it at level 3 when I originally attempted it.
I think the makeup of your party and the resources you have at your disposal make a huge difference. I have two rogues (my character+ astarion) and I don't think I could have done it with a melee approach at that level. Also I chose thief for astarion, which I recommend if you haven't.
After failing the first few times at level 3, I made a comment to a friend who is also playing it and he said, "no way, that's too early! You need to be at least level 5 and have Karlach in your team". He also asked what other areas of the map I had explored, and recommended I go search the ruins to the east and get xp before attempting the boss fight at the goblin camp.
I cleared the ruins and pottered around until I got to 4, then got bored with exploring and also more confident with my understanding of the mechanics and strategies, so I tried again and succeeded.
I recommend you do something similar, just enjoy exploring and take it slow. Eventually you'll feel like it's the right time and you'll beat the challenge.
As for the ogres, I think people meant you can ask Withers for hirelings. I totally missed Withers when he first appeared at my camp. I remember taking a long rest and getting a warning "someone wants to speak with you! Are you sure you want to go to sleep?" Or similar. I checked so many times wondering who wanted to talk to me lol. Didn't see him until the next day . So my recommendation is, go to camp and have a good look, use your map and you will see Withers. He shows up when you are level 3.
It'd be a shame of you to miss out on a game you say you are enjoying and that you want to see where the story goes just because you don't meet some imaginary standards of gaming performance you've set up yourself based on the Internet hivemind out of all things. Just go play your way.