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I'd say, that's anti-social on every level. Just because everyone does it and it was always "normal" before (culture...), doesn't make it any less anti-social or wrong. At least in my book. And yes, that is indeed the circle-back. As in that all of those personality disorders show a serious obsession with control. Besides that the act itself is pure control by force. Sure, there will be many examples where sheer animal lust ranks higher than the lust for control, but it's a spectrum and rarely just on the "just horny!"-side but probably often far to the control-side.
That seems to be the case indeed. The notion that it seems so, not that it actually is.
As a misanthropist dealing daily with victims of abuse, how could I not? (besides it being anecdotal evidence: 100% of every of those stories resolves around control, sex is just ONE of the things)
Totally not. Doesn't even matter how I see it or not, even my motivation would not matter in the end. It's simply wrong/evil in an absolute way without any added layers of society/religion/belief/group-dynamics/whatever. In my worldview at least, which is usually not the same as most people's. The layers explain, but not excuse. I can understand/empathise with sociopaths or religious nutjobs. I see how they could end up with such a conclusion. But not excuse. In the end, we're all capable of reflection. Some more, some less. We don't just do, we rationalize.