this post was submitted on 04 Mar 2026
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Names and remembering (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works to c/adhd@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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Is it a common thing for ADHD or au/ADHD people to be weird with names?

For example, I don't like my name. I don't really like when people say it either. I also rarely call other people by name unless I'm absolutely sure I know it, because getting it wrong is terrifying. I much prefer "man, bud, hey you".

People tell me its because I'm selfish and don't care about others, because I can remember every year that certain albums were released from certain bands, but I can't remember my neighbors name who talks to me maybe once every 3 months or the person I just met 5 minutes ago.

There's also those super friendly outgoing people that say your name like 5 times in a sentence, which kind of creeps me out. I know thats a salesman tactic too.

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[–] Arcanepotato@crazypeople.online 6 points 6 days ago

I am similar, hate using names (even if I know them) and have trouble remembering them.

My not remembering them has a lot to do with face blindness. If everyone looks the same I can't remember who is who until I figure out their idk, shape? Motions? Virtual meetings were a nightmare. No, I don't remember you, sorry!

Names are intimate and fraught with pitfalls. It still weirds me out when my husband uses my full first name. He has a nickname for me and if someone else calls me by that it feels extremely uncomfortable. Different friend groups/family groups also have different names for me. I didn't choose any of them and they are generally fine but again if I get called by an unexpected name it's fucking weird.

That salesman tactic also creeps me out.

You aren't selfish, your brain just works different. People can fuck right off with that ableist shit.