this post was submitted on 17 Mar 2026
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[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 35 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Summon 8 monkeys, command half of them to attempt to stabilize the Paladin. They'll probably be fine for a round if they just went down

[–] MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca 33 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The bad news is the monkey's poor rolls mean they didn't stabalize the paladin. The good news is they found a typewriter and have a pretty good rough draft going on the complete works of Shakespeare.

oh no one of the monkeys just murthered the pally with the typewriter. you got a script signed Chris Marlowe though

[–] agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ambiguous "they"s make it look like you want those monkeys to fellate the paladin

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I could change it to not be ambiguous, but this is funny to me so I'm leaving it

Cure Wounds has a verbal component, but since the monkeys can't speak they substitute an oral component