this post was submitted on 27 Mar 2026
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Imagine if that was one long spaghetti and you could just suck the whole thing without chewing.
You're so unbelievably wrong, and let me explain why in this comment.
There is no physical way to efficiently and effectively cook a single spaghetti noodle, as no commercial cookware would accommodate such a noodle.
Furthermore, removing the noodle and placing it in a plate without the gargantuan noodle separating into smaller noodles, due to weight and lateral shearing, would be unheard of due to the physics of the gravity of the world's... physics.
Here I have included a link to my sources to you can educate yourself, you silly silly SILLY goose
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33374933/
How about a fresh (as in not dried) spaghetti noodle that's passed directly from the extrusion, through a trough of boiling water with a conveyor belt to move it along and support the weight, then direct to the plate?
Well that would be fantastic, if not for Article 128 in the Costituzione Della Repubblica Italiana; as this states no pasta may be cooked directly from extrusion, except in the circumstances of impending death, as laid out in Article 110. So you may certainly try such a procedure, but you risk becoming an international criminal.
I've looked at it from every angle, as I am certified the best master debater.
See the thing is just because there is a law or article or what ever about it, doesn’t mean it’s going to get followed or that - that action is physically undoable.
There are laws saying we can’t do stuff, but people break them anyway.
So the conveyor idea might work perfectly fine therefore proving you wrong about this whole debate.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER ~/s~
Break the... law? On... purpose??
THIS ONE RIGHT HERE OFFICERS COME QUICK
Places uno reverse card on table
This is actually how internet debates go. I should know, I'm an expert!
I don't even think you'd need a special pot. A fresh noodle into enough water you can provide gentle agitation without whacking the noodle excessively, slide it out the pot into a colander, and then again gently slide onto plate. If you want more even saucing, I'd go from colander back into a pot with some sauce on bottom, then pour more sauce over top, and out to plate to get a more even coating without having to pull the noodle through sauce. You could even hand form the noodle with a bit of work. Roll noodle dough into a sheet and make alternating cuts like this and then smooth out the bends.
To me, the real trouble with a long noodle is: then what? Would you slurp a 100 ft noodle in one go, stopping for breaths?
Circular breathing of course, no need to stop
Lol I did think of that, but I still thought most people's mouths would need a break, and the second that noodle stops moving and trips the gag reflex, all chaos could break loose! That's potentially a lot of night to have change course on you! 😧
I posted this further down the thread... but
Except hands free
Aww, you didn't have to delete that. I believe you're technically correct, since proper spaghetti is an extruded pasta.
I like all noodles, so I ignored the technicality.
How the hell did you read that, i literally wrote it, sent it and thought "uhmm yeah but i guess people don't care enough" and deleted 2 sec after i sent it XD
I'm not super in the know about how all this stuff works, but it's the result of how federation works.
You made your post on feddit, hit send, and then it flows out to every Lemmy host federated with feddit. So once you toss a post out there, it's now out there in (insert number of federated servers) different copies stored individually on those hosts.
Now you decide to delete. That can be prioritized or handled differently based on the version of Lemmy each host is running.
I got a reply notification saying you replied to one of my comments, but when I clicked the notification, it said you deleted it.
I am even less clear about how deletes are handled, but it's saved my butt before when I've accidentally deleted one of my own posts. There must be some type of buffer time between when a delete request is received and when it is actually purged.
If you hit the reply button on a deleted post, you will sometimes get to read the stored post! I can't see your deleted comment now, so that's what makes me think there's a built in delay, but I obviously could read it fine yesterday to reply to what you said.
You can do it on any deleted comment. I like finding deleted down voted comments and trying this "trick" to see what things people try to hide from the record.
I'm sure I've if the instance communities or maybe one of the privacy ones could give you much better details, but this is my for dummies like me version.
If you're unaware, people can also look who upvotes/downvotes. It's not available to most people in Lemmy itself, but there's an online tool that posts the info since it's technically public, just obscured by the UI.
So a lot of Lemmy falls under the old "once something is on the Internet, it always is" thing. Once you post or vote, it doesn't always just go poof when you ask the computer to make it go away.
We were going to do that, but it was deemed to be dark magick too powerful to unleash on this plane. We instead focus on room temperature superconductor research.
They have really long noodle cafes in China where they regularly serve noodles in the 20 meter range. In fact, China even has the world record.
Incredible, you have bested me at my own game. The link you provided is relevant and interesting, the information is concise and factual, and you used metric instead of imperial (the more intellectual measurement system)
Thank you for freeing me from my role as professional Internet debater.
I'm free^eee^^^eee^^
adjusts fedora
I think you’re giving a bit too much credit here. The link may have been relevant, but that doesn’t automatically make the argument complete or correct—concise information can still omit important context or nuance.
Also, calling metric the “more intellectual” system is more of a preference than an objective truth. Both systems have their uses depending on context, and framing one as inherently superior doesn’t really strengthen the discussion.
And as for being “free,” stepping away from one debate doesn’t really mean you’ve escaped the role—you’re still engaging, just from a different angle. That pull to argue and evaluate doesn’t disappear that easily.
adjusts tweed cap
Got any sources there bud, or you just trying to speak facts into existence? I think Kant would like to have a word about your philosophy of "freedom". I won't go into anymore detail though...
Oh yeah? Well... ur mom
😎
(im sorry)
You're right, i should inspire to be more like my mother, thank you, you have helped me see the error of my way
Is what i would like to say, but sadly this is the Internet so instead i am forced to say "no u" 😞
You have a final exam coming up tomorrow, don't you?
Long pot of water would do it
Show me this long pot, I must see
Here you go, long water pot.
You absolute fool! You think you can just link a source to prove your point, and nobody would actually read it?
Your source speaks nothing of the shearing forces of cooked spaghetti noodles... it's a paper about lentil-fortified pasta and it's nutritional gain vs change in texture
Zero to do with the ability to cook one very long noodle. In fact, it absolutely can be done, with a conventional pot of boiling water and making sure it's al dente. My source for your learning pleasure. Now who's the silly silly goose‽
https://www.mdpi.com/2304-8158/10/1/4
Oh no, I've been found out-
Hol up
Shit, we've both been had!
Conveyors brah
This is my favorite comment.
I am DEEPLY saddened that this isn’t a rickroll
Thank you for speaking my thoughts out loud
I once had a dog who liked to... idk he was a weird little shit, loved him. Anyway, I saw him chewing on something once, and he wouldn't "drop it". So I went to pull it out of his mouth and it was a string of some sort; and I proceeded to pull out like half a meter of string that he had (mostly) swallowed
I guess he was savoring the last few inches or whatever, but it was like a magic show where they pull handkerchiefs from their mouth
Anyhoo, thanks for coming to my TED Talk
*one long spaghetto
Jordan, is that you?
https://youtu.be/6A8W77m-ZTw?t=1m49s
A true man of science