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Legal loophole
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this post was submitted on 25 Nov 2023
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Old age.
Sure thing. You will do so in that cage over there. To the guards: He already had his last meal.
Wouldn't he starve to death before dying of old age?
Nobody dies of "old age". As you become older, it is becomes harder to survive various diseases or afflictions. But where do you draw the line? If someone was to weak and fragile to leave their bed, and died due to no longer getting any energie from food, is that dying of old age? And what if they are to fragile to leave their cage?
If one is allowed to set timespan for "execution" to "however long it takes me to die of old age", then I argue it is also perfectly fine to take some liberty with the definition of "die of old age".
Back in 3.5, there were specific rules for dying of old age. 5e is less clear about it.
That actually worked once, for a Jester named Triboulet who did things like slap the King's bottom and spread gossip. He chose his execution method as a joke and the King actually laughed, so he was exiled.
In earlier editions, Ghosts rapidly aged anyone they touched by draining their life force. Just saying.
And now just seeing it (and failing a save) ages you.
Still would.
"big ass tiddies, your honor"
DEATH BY SNU SNU
Okay someone go get my horse.
"Not that merciful. Guards, off with his head!"