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this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2024
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All the people who are not choosing to chill with a usually calm intelligent mammal because "snakes will get out of your way" apparently don't know shit about black mambas:
Give me a big strong dude intelligent enough to leave you alone after you're demonstrated that you're not a threat any day!
Malls have food, I'd be that gorillas personal chef for 24 hours
That was my thought. Me and my new best friend are going to learn to make pretzels! Together!
Turns out the prompt wasn't for a survival horror but a buddy movie
Couldn't you just like go in an upstairs bathroom and just lock the door?
The snakes could go down the drain of a toilet in the other restroom, and come out inside your restroom.
I am sick of these mother fucking snakes in the mother fucking bathroom
I'm an tired of these mother fucking mambas in this mother fucking mall
I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES IN THIS MOTHERFUCKING BATHROOM
Maybe, but that would work with the Silverback too 🤷
Regardless, 24 hours locked in a bathroom could be its own kind of hell tbh..
Meh that isn't too far away from my life most days. Except I don't have to wash dishes.
At least with the gorilla I'd feel safe sleeping after locking enough doors, can not say the same with the snakes.
From the same Wikipedia article:
Good thing there's no corners or enclosed areas in malls
Yup, I'd feel much safer with a gorilla. But I'm stupid enough to try to befriend him with fruits lol
As long as you're careful about displaying submissive body language and not getting too close, the worst thing that could happen is probably that he gets to snack on fruit and ignores you 🤷
Probably have to REALLY know what you're doing though lol
Just lock yourself in. Try finding a door that can withstand a gorilla tho.
That's true. I read gorillas require that you invite them in. Also they're afraid of crosses and holy water.
Nah, that's lawyers you're thinking of. Gorillas are the ones who howl at the moon and have been observed by Warren Zevon casually strolling around all over London.
The gorilla won't even care that you're there as long as you don't get too close and act too aggressively. It's definitely not going to hunt you down and break down the door to get to you unless its family is in there too or something like that.
Also, as I pointed out to the other one, being locked in a bathroom for 24 hours is its own kind of hell for some of us.
Besides, one of the snakes might be hiding in that bathroom and you won't know until it's too late. Silverback gorillas, on the other hand, are not known for stealth.