If you find out, please do tell me. I'm tired of getting guilt tripped for "oh, don't you love me? give me a hug!". I've never understood why people just can't accept that some people don't like being touched and they take it personally.

no fucking clue how to deal with it, but you're so valid for feeling this way. the amount of non-consensual touching in society that people feel entitled to is just absolutely fucking insane to me. church boomers especially just be touchin everyone. i stopped being in situations where i'm with people who are like that.

Stop going to death cult meetings

First of all, you deserve to be treated with respect, no question. There's no reasoning behind the touching without permission behavior that I can understand that isn't shallow or selfish in origin. Your post made me cringe because I feel the same about being touched.

I've used "No hugs, thanks," and will offer a handshake or fist bump. I have physically sidestepped people by twisting away from them, and I've even pushed people away from me, forcefully when needed... how do you not get immediately angry at them for violating your personal space? I can't hide my disgust if someone does this to me, and even if it pisses them off I'll just repeat that I don't want to be touched until they stop trying to argue or shame me. I see it as a comfort level that should be respected, and usually people are mature enough to not press it.

CW: bear armor, references to bear baiting and historical bear hunting practices

Put on the whole armor of fighting bears

I have no real advice. Sounds like you're dealing with some weird Evangelical thing, and most of those groups view any dissent as aggression. You're fighting an uphill battle against a hostile culture.

Have you tried pepper spray?
Edit: this isn't meant to belittle the problem, I hear your frustration and in my mind it's a funny joke to suggest you defend your boundaries as sharply as one might for other kinds of non-consentual touching

some people come in slow for the hugs and I don't like it but it's not a big deal, but for some reason there's always that asshole who moves in fast and aggressive and their hugs are very violent and grope-y and fuck that guy. atheists, in all their so called "rational logic", can't think of a better reason to not goto church than the ever present hug assaulter.

If someone looks like they want to touch me I say "no thank you" and take a step backwards away from them. If someone touches me without my knowledge I twist away from them, yell "NO", and maybe give them a slap if I'm feeling it. If any bystanders question me about it I say something about "...get his hands off me".

If it's a touchy relative or something, I try to talk to them about it to make them understand that it's surprising and shocking to be touched without forewarning. If it's a relative that doesn't internalise that, I try to be aware of the situation and take control of it by touching them first, e.g. putting my hands on their shoulders first and moving closer for a "hug".