The world is in such an amount of crap that I actually thought it was a real headline for a second

I'm so used to nottheonion being on here, that I had a big wtf until I saw the source.

Uvalde already did this irl

Then goes home to beat his wife after

He's not playing dead he just found out he was in the general vicinity of some fentanyl.

Here I go again subscribing to both c/theonion and c/nottheonion.

Just about ate this one, too. 🙃 Because of course he did

Might as well hire a possum, cheaper and better at the job

So brave, and such a miracle recovery from a totally complete death zero doctors were able to confirm!

Can't verify on any other sources and the officers name hasn't been with Scotts Valley PD before.

Looks like a case of fake news imo atm