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submitted 3 months ago by HotWheelsVroom@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml
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[-] tias@discuss.tchncs.de 29 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
[-] HotWheelsVroom@lemmy.ml 27 points 3 months ago
[-] combo@mastodon.ml 13 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

@HotWheelsVroom Lmao, I also like that one very much
"It's functions include... ...being all ass backwards fuck". Magical

But I'll still add another great one - Political Talk Show Host Suddenly Very Interested In Manslaughter Law Loopholes (https://youtu.be/xOVQPtuKRs4)

[-] HotWheelsVroom@lemmy.ml 9 points 3 months ago

The system specs tho LMFAO 🤣🤣🤣

System Specifications:

  • Makes the most irritating beeping noise you've ever heard in your goddamn life
  • Fucks up everything else you hook it up to
  • 'Scans for receivers', whatever the fuck that means
  • Flashes random fucking words and numbers on the display screen
[-] anarcho_blinkenist@lemmy.ml 3 points 3 months ago

to this day I still occasionally mutter "it never ends, this shit..."

[-] mathemachristian@hexbear.net 20 points 3 months ago
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[-] atro_city@fedia.io 19 points 3 months ago
[-] Akasazh@feddit.nl 15 points 3 months ago
[-] sunbrrnslapper@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago

Everything is just a few hundred clicks away.

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[-] atro_city@fedia.io 3 points 3 months ago

"I'll buy anything that's shiny and comes from Apple" 👌

[-] HotWheelsVroom@lemmy.ml 3 points 3 months ago

The wheel. Reinvented.

God, I fucking love you, Onion...

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[-] Godort@lemm.ee 17 points 3 months ago
[-] python@programming.dev 17 points 3 months ago

I love the entire "Autistic Reporter" Series for some reason lol

[-] Canadian_Cabinet@lemmy.ca 4 points 3 months ago

How do I go to prison??

[-] nichtburningturtle@feddit.org 17 points 3 months ago
[-] pedz@lemmy.ca 15 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

The one about the memorial built in advance for a damn disaster that they all saw coming but did nothing about, except for the memorial of the future victims.

This disaster will have been preventable. All of the warning signs are here now. Yet, no one will have fucking done anything about it.

[-] anarcho_blinkenist@lemmy.ml 15 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
[-] anarcho_blinkenist@lemmy.ml 13 points 3 months ago

honorable mention to New Marijuana Study Confirms Everyone Knows You're High And You Will Be Stoned Forever

because when this was originally uploaded on their website it would play a slightly different version every time you opened the page. So you'd laugh and show your friends, so then even if your (allegedly) stoner ass hadn't gotten tripped out the first time, while they're watching it and laughing you'd start sweating.

Second honorable mention to "Is The Government Spying on Schizophrenics Enough?" But I'm honestly still not sure that one's totally okay, even if I still laugh every single time I watch it. I'm not that type of mentally ill but have had people close to me who struggle enough with it and the very nature of the disorder is such that even though I laugh I've always at the same time felt it treads very much on the line.

[-] PanaX@lemmy.ml 14 points 3 months ago
[-] tetris11@lemmy.ml 11 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
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[-] PaupersSerenade@sh.itjust.works 11 points 3 months ago

Oldie but a goldie; Some Bullshit Happening Somewhere

It’s just so amazingly on point

[-] lolcatnip@reddthat.com 11 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
[-] HarryOru@lemm.ee 9 points 3 months ago
[-] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago

I like the Taliban guy telling the 911 conspiracy guy that 911 was real.

[-] christian@lemmy.ml 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Always been partial to Victim In Fatal Car Accident Tragically Not Glenn Beck

"I heard screaming and I thought it was just someone doing an accurate impression of Glenn Beck talking normally, but then I saw the smoke."

[-] Sickos@hexbear.net 3 points 3 months ago
[-] theturtlemoves@hexbear.net 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
[-] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago
[-] smackjack@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago

These comments are proof that The Onion peaked like 15 years ago. They just haven't been as funny since then.

[-] LapGoat@pawb.social 6 points 3 months ago

i dont think its the onions fault, parody just got more difficult when real life is already ridiculous

[-] thrawn@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

Weirdly, this comment is a little hasty but only because of recent developments. ONN presumably didn’t make enough money so it was canceled, thus they couldn’t keep doing sketches like that. Now that The Onion has bought itself from its corporate owners, ONN is said to be returning. If the new ONN sucks this comment will be accurate though.

[-] sunbrrnslapper@lemmy.world 6 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

HP Offers 'That Cloud Thing Everyone Is Talking About": https://youtu.be/9ntPxdWAWq8?si=wHKW3AJSuDnGDRq9

[-] gerbler@lemmy.world 5 points 3 months ago
[-] Andrzej3K@hexbear.net 5 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Dominos Tests Limits of what Humans will Eat https://youtu.be/31JNEVHZxO8?si=o86xWZBMC-jw0xAl

[-] griD@feddit.org 4 points 3 months ago
[-] Resol@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

The MacBook Wheel. Imagine how disastrous this product would be if it actually happened.

Not to mention that was the first time I discovered the Onion.

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[-] PatheticGroundThing@beehaw.org 4 points 3 months ago
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[-] DaPorkchop_@lemmy.ml 4 points 3 months ago
[-] Maiq@lemy.lol 3 points 3 months ago
[-] PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 3 months ago
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[-] General_Shenanigans@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

ONN Exclusive: One-on-One Interview with God https://youtu.be/Vo1IwmaUz90?feature=shared

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this post was submitted on 15 Sep 2024
103 points (92.6% liked)

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