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[-] Bougie_Birdie@lemmy.blahaj.zone 355 points 2 months ago

I once had my employer perform a wellness check when I was having a mental health episode.

I was working remotely, but my mental health was in the toilet. I had a candid conversation with my supervisor where I told him I needed some time off because I had been feeling suicidal. He was an absolute bro, told me I was doing a good job, and that I earned some time off. He agreed that our conditions and the demands from management were absurd. He tells me to just take some time, and he'll clear the way with HR.

Well, I'm logging off my computer when I get a call from his boss. He's asking why I'm suddenly taking some time off. I tell him that I haven't been feeling well, but he keeps badgering me for a specific reason. I tell him that I'm very vulnerable and don't want to disclose a reason. That's between me and my doctor.

Well he keeps pressing and he tells me that, "sharing our vulnerabilities is what fosters trust." So I'm like fine, you really want to know, this job and your management style are making me suicidal.

Tone immediately shifts. He's going into full damage control cover-your-ass mode. He tells me that I should consider a different career if I'm not up to the task. I'm already having like the worst day of my life (so far) and I start to have a panic attack.

I tell him you know what, it's not his business and I'm going to call my doctor. Before I can get on the phone with my doctor, HR is calling me. They tell me they have to get hold of my emergency contact to make sure I'm not currently killing myself. I tell them my emergency contact is out of town (unrelated), so they say they have to call the police. I ask her not to, there's no risk to myself and things have been taken out of context. HR insists that it's company policy.

So while I'm hyperventilating because my boss pressed me for more details than I was comfortable sharing about my health, they sent a man with a gun to my house to check on me.

I understand that the company is protecting its liability or whatever. But I really felt that my rights had been violated somehow. The police are not suitable to intervene in a mental health episode. I had a new fear that I wouldn't be able to calm down when the police arrived and I'd end up shot or something.

TLDR - I know this post is fake, but companies really do feel like they own their employees. A wellness check from your employer is absolutely bullshit, but that won't stop them from trying.

[-] burgersc12@mander.xyz 124 points 2 months ago

I learned at a real young age to never tell anyone you feel suicidal unless you want to end up "involuntarily committed". Won't even bring up my depression unless I'm around a real friend.

[-] ironhydroxide@sh.itjust.works 52 points 2 months ago

Same.

Perfect solution to feeling like life has no worth except making profits for billionaires is obviously to forcibly lock them up in a hospital for a week and stick them with a $20k bill. That'll fix all that depression. /s

[-] Kyatto@leminal.space 27 points 2 months ago

It's not just a hospital too by the way. It was a murder short of feeling like I was in the asylum from outlast. Wailing, fighting, screaming and all other sorts of antisocial behavior, with the staff barely in control. At the least that was how it felt and being committed to that place beyond just preventing my possible suicide in the short term became a lasting traumatic experience.

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[-] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 20 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Same. I did have a therapist a few years ago that I told some real bad shit to, but that was after a couple of years of building trust; I was still scared of getting a pair of grippy socks. I went to see them because of a... let's go with a 'stopped suicide attempt'. Stroke at a young age, fiancé left me, no hope, career goals shattered, physically fucked, financially ruined, etc so rock bottom was looking down at me like 'damn bro I'm sorry'.

A few close friends know things that others don't, shit I'm not about to spill here. But it's because they either have been in a similar situation and we have worked to keep each other alive and going, or they have degrees in the field of mental health and don't mind trying to keep my head above water, or they are my (ex, current, etc) partner.

There's no fucking way I'm going to just casually be like "you ever just want to go to the roof, get right on the ledge, shoot yourself - and in case that doesn't take you out, the concrete walkway at the foot of the 20 story fall will finish the job? No? Just me then? Ha, funny. I hate life. Haha."

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[-] cnirrad@lemmy.world 70 points 2 months ago

That is fucked up. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I hope you have found a better company to work for.

[-] Bougie_Birdie@lemmy.blahaj.zone 60 points 2 months ago

Thanks for the kind words, friend.

I know this is a comedy community and I'm not trying to be a bring down. But I also think it's important to talk about this kind of thing because, well, it's the kind of thing that corporate america would want to sweep under the rug. We need to normalize talking about mental health because it's yet another public health crisis that doesn't get enough attention.

I'm out of that dumpster fire now, but I'm still looking for my dream job.

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[-] CarbonatedPastaSauce@lemmy.world 58 points 2 months ago

Life gets a lot easier when you realize you don't have to answer questions that you don't want to, and "No" is a complete sentence. Not berating you, just letting you know that you didn't have to fall for their pressure tactics. Just keep not answering their questions until they give up.

I hope you're doing better these days.

[-] MonkeMischief@lemmy.today 22 points 2 months ago

Yeah there's absolutely this feedback loop conditioning where nobody tells us this. And even if we know it, actually putting it into practice is such a mountain.

I'm vehemently anti-authoritarian, but damn if the "yield to authority" conditioning isn't shock-collaring me every time some douche in a suit wants to talk to me like I'm a child in trouble.

[-] lefixxx@lemmy.world 44 points 2 months ago

sharing our vulnerabilities is what fosters trust

Other way around bruh

[-] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 16 points 2 months ago

Sharing trust is what fosters our vulnerabilities?

[-] Strawberry@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 2 months ago

trust is what fosters sharing our vulnerabilities

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[-] CosmicTurtle0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 2 months ago

I understand that the company is protecting its liability or whatever.

The company can do that by training your boss not to ask questions related to your health.

[-] Promethiel@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago

Holy fuck. That is beyond the pale, and I'm sorry you had to go through that. Chills thinking how wrong that could go.

[-] can@sh.itjust.works 18 points 2 months ago

Jesus fucking christ, I have nothing to add other than I'm so sorry you went through that.

[-] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 16 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Pretty sure you have clear grounds for a lawsuit on that one. I feel like you'd easily win compensation. (This is my guess. Obviously consult a lawyer ha)

For future reference though, just keep things high level and say it's a mental health concern. Or even just a general health issue. NEVER disclose that much information to an employer again.

But yeah, you should totally file a lawsuit.

[-] qarbone@lemmy.world 27 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

As someone who was very mentally fragile years ago, it's very easy to say "just don't engage, hang up the phone". But, when someone is verbally beating you down, it can slip your mind under the pressure.

OP said they were keeping it high-level but their over-boss kept pressing for specifics. I don't think they need a reference guide in this instance.

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[-] lemmydividebyzero@reddthat.com 134 points 2 months ago

This is fake!

If it was real, the "Nevermind" button would be a "Maybe later" button instead...

[-] Anticorp@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago

"Ask me again in 4 minutes"

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[-] MonkeMischief@lemmy.today 99 points 2 months ago

The line between dystopic memes and Black Mirror is getting hella blurry :|

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[-] Sundial@lemm.ee 87 points 2 months ago

Please tell me this is a joke. I legitimately don't know if it is or isn't.

[-] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 138 points 2 months ago

It is a joke, lol

This guy makes these terrible concepts for apps and stuff:

[-] NarrativeBear@lemmy.world 37 points 2 months ago

Not gona lie, I do like the speed limit leaderboard. Though I would see people trying to get the "high score" on something like this.

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[-] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago

Does Lemmy have a “hostile UI” community?

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[-] Rentlar@lemmy.ca 38 points 2 months ago

Definity a fake post. The small text says the cost of the check deducted from the employee's payroll.

[-] solsangraal@lemmy.zip 35 points 2 months ago

meanwhile useless incompetent middle managers across america are seeing the post and salivating while furiously looking for where to sign up for the service

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[-] Sundial@lemm.ee 25 points 2 months ago

Honestly, based on the stories of what's happening in America. That's not a reliable indicator.

[-] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 months ago

"cost deducted from employee's payroll" is the most realistic part, IMHO. I worry this joke will give someone ideas IRL. And that part is how they will sell it to CEOs.

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[-] thisbenzingring 59 points 2 months ago

this is funny and reminds me that when you call in sick

just say you are calling in sick, don't give any reasons. Fuck them they don't need to know why

sometimes mental health days where you just chill and do shit you want to do is a perfectly good sick day

[-] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 29 points 2 months ago

Mental health is health. Take the sick day.

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[-] Anderenortsfalsch@discuss.tchncs.de 51 points 2 months ago

Nice joke until reality comes along: https://winfuture.de/news,145540.html

German article translates to:

The Tesla plant in Grünheide had to accept a record number of sick days, at least in August: Around 17 percent of the 12,000 employees were affected. At the beginning of September, the figure had fallen to around 11 percent, according to a report in the Handelsblatt newspaper. However, this is still comparatively high.

As a result, the plant management had begun to visit employees on sick leave at home and check on them. Head of HR Erik Demmler was surprised that he was sometimes met with an aggressive attitude, as he explained to Handelsblatt. It had happened that the door had simply been slammed in his face. There were even instances of people threatening to call the police.

Translated with DeepL.com (free version)

[-] NeoNachtwaechter@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago

...and I am sure that these managers are going to have fun with a bombardment of lawsuits soon

[-] Jesus_666@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

Yeah. That kind of behavior is super inappropriate and doesn't sound legal in Germany.

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[-] Juice@midwest.social 50 points 2 months ago

I'm glad I was able to intervene when an employee just didn't show up for a few days, couldn't get ahold of him. My manager (a good guy) asked me if I thought we should call the cops for a wellness check, I told him we couldn't call the cops on a disabled black guy.

Not sure what went down with him but he ended up calling in and he was okay. He either quit shortly after or never came back, I don't remember. Last I heard he was pursuing his passion teaching skiing to kids with cancer and disabilities. Cool dude.

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[-] HawlSera@lemm.ee 50 points 2 months ago

Please tell me this isn't real

[-] Masta_Chief@lemmy.world 73 points 2 months ago

Just a joke from an insta account that does a lot of these kinds of posts. Just a joke so far...

[-] WhatYouNeed@lemmy.world 22 points 2 months ago

Right now. HR are in talks with the developers.

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[-] sevan@lemmy.ca 46 points 2 months ago

I used to work for a call center that had an automated call out system, so you didn't have to talk to anyone or give a specific excuse. However, at some point management instituted a policy requiring supervisors to call their employees to "check in on their wellbeing." I don't even have to be cynical to know the real purpose because I was in the meetings where they talked about it as a tactic to reduce absenteeism.

[-] Paddzr@lemmy.world 18 points 2 months ago

Surely you didn't have to answer, if your policy is "do X to call in sick". You're just putting your phone to silent to rest.

[-] sevan@lemmy.ca 18 points 2 months ago

That would be my response, but a lot of people can be guilt tripped into coming in to work anyway.

[-] Etterra@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago

Jokes on them, I stopped being vulnerable to guilt tripping at 17. I guess my alcoholic abusive mother was good for something after all.

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[-] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 43 points 2 months ago

I'm at home with ruptured vaginal cyst. Dare you to try this.

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[-] umbrella@lemmy.ml 36 points 2 months ago

this aint funny though more like depressing

[-] aquinteros@lemmy.world 16 points 2 months ago

wellness checks are deducted from her payroll??? is this legal ? the us labor laws are weird man

[-] JackLSauce@lemmy.world 32 points 2 months ago

You're not wrong but this image is a parody

[-] Boozilla@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

My employer generally sucks, but one of the few things they do right is give us no-questions-asked PTO. Nobody cares if we take a day, it's part of our compensation.

[-] zephorah@lemm.ee 14 points 2 months ago

Standing too close to occurring in the near future to qualify as funny.

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this post was submitted on 27 Sep 2024
714 points (96.6% liked)

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