522
Anon's uncle is sick (sh.itjust.works)
top 34 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] rockSlayer@lemmy.world 162 points 1 month ago

There's a story that Wong Wifu, the great Chinese martial artist... had a fight with a guy and beat him. Then the guy gave him this light tap. Wong looked at him and the guy just nodded. That was it. He had given him the death touch. Wong died.

Then and there?

No. About eighteen years later. That's the thing about Dim Mak... you never know when it's gonna take effect.

[-] BananaTrifleViolin@lemmy.world 76 points 1 month ago

Statistically if you're born, at some point you will die. Being born is deadly.

[-] Maestro@fedia.io 60 points 1 month ago

Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% fatality rate

[-] Klear@lemmy.world 27 points 1 month ago
[-] XTL@sopuli.xyz 9 points 1 month ago
[-] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 month ago

planning for a busy weekend?

[-] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 month ago

When did we run out of unique souls and added in NPCs?

[-] Dalvoron@lemm.ee 25 points 1 month ago

About 90-95% of humans have died at some point in their lives so yeah very likely we will follow suit at some point.

[-] Joeffect@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

It's more than that... I know you were joking but ...

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Estimates_of_historical_world_population

Yeah it's estimated but it's a shit ton of people so it's more like 99.9%

[-] taladar@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 month ago

You underestimate the effects of population growth. There was a lot of time in prehistory but the population at any given point was tiny compared to today.

[-] Num10ck@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

i remember an old article that said DNA shows that all current humans can be traced back to 7 women during the ice age.

[-] meowMix2525@lemm.ee 7 points 1 month ago

There were probably more around at the time, all the other bloodlines just died off.

[-] tetris11@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 month ago

And they were all neighbours in the same age and shared a WhatsApp group.

[-] Joeffect@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

Those people were alive and died it doesn't matter... There have been more people dead than are currently living by a lot.

We don't care how many people were alive back than compared to today. It's the total amount to how many have died...

[-] taladar@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 month ago

We don’t care how many people were alive back than compared to today.

But that is exactly the ratio you claim to be 99.9% when in reality it is closer to 93%.

[-] Joeffect@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

No your right, my bad I'm terrible at math and sick

[-] Dalvoron@lemm.ee 7 points 1 month ago

Hang on there based on the image, 7.95 billion alive today, 109 billion have lived and died, that's like 93% death rate not 99.9%. Is there some other figure on the page you're basing the 99.9% off?

[-] r00ty@kbin.life 3 points 1 month ago

Lies, damned lies, and statistics.

[-] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 59 points 1 month ago
[-] jabathekek@sopuli.xyz 38 points 1 month ago

Tendies for the tendie throne.

[-] jabathekek@sopuli.xyz 48 points 1 month ago

Can I take a moment to talk to you about our one true lord and saviour, Satan?

[-] Jolteon@lemmy.zip 18 points 1 month ago

Is Jehovah witness Satan different from regular Christian Satan?

[-] jabathekek@sopuli.xyz 21 points 1 month ago

No, in such a way that neither of those denominations represent Satan correctly.

[-] reseller_pledge609@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

You've got me curious. Care to elaborate?

[-] MutilationWave@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Satan seems to be the good guy in the Bible, given there's scant evidence of a literal hell of eternal damnation. Even if any of this were real, god created hell, not Satan.

Satan never destroyed the entire world or nuked cities or anything like that. I can't think of a bad thing he does in the Bible except maybe the Job bet. And even then god is worse on that one.

Here are the tenets of the Satanic Temple. You decide.

[-] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 month ago

Eh, the concept of hell really varies a lot by denomination, from the classic burning hell in Catholicism to a more "internal" hell of separation from God in Eastern Orthodoxy. I personally subscribe a bit more to the latter than the former, because I don't understand why a loving god would punish his children who disobey for eternity. In this latter view, Satan is merely an angel who rebelled and was kicked out of God's presence, and thus his only goal is to ruin things for the rest of us.

[-] reseller_pledge609@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I've seen the tenets and absolutely agree with them. Don't think they seriously represent Satan though. I think the name is purely for shock. Religious types couldn't fathom a satanist being a decent person.

[-] olafurp@lemmy.world 41 points 1 month ago

Blood for the blood god. Khorne loves him

[-] HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world 35 points 1 month ago
[-] Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 month ago

It's Greentext

[-] unknown1234_5@kbin.earth 4 points 1 month ago

just focus on the positive, you won't be cold after you die.

this post was submitted on 21 Nov 2024
522 points (96.6% liked)

Greentext

4768 readers
953 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS