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Adoption Certificate for Nellie, the Daily Thread numbat (with thanks to @Catfish)
Thank you for the kind words earlier Friends, I'm feeling a lot more okay now. Sometimes my brain gets carried away.
I did things that cheered me up and that really helped, made some cheesy potato cake thingys and planted one of my propagated monsteras in a pot and changed the pot of another plant and that all made me feel better. I'll have to relax tonight and put a face mask on and do some graphic design/drawing so I can get my Lizzo T-shirt and/or bag done in time.
Damn okay, the place I had an interview with today, in-person, has already sent me a request for another interview with the boss-boss.
I think I must've made a good impression today π¬π
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Just a little song I wrote for you. Ah-um
You are a champion, my friend
And you'll keep on fighting to the end
You are a champion YOU ARE A CHAMPION
No time for losers
Coz you are the champion of the world. π
ππ I love it! Thank you Queen of DT π
Didn't see who's turn it was, but I figured I'm awake so I'll slap it up :) happy monday my open-source friends! Wishing you well!!
Shout-out to my neighbour.! Brought over homemade doughnuts yesterday.
Neighbour rating: βοΈβοΈβοΈβοΈβοΈ
Survived the interview, went well i think! They seemed to like me. One more with boss-boss and hopefully I'll be an employed individual soon!
Edit: i love trams, but i wish this one didnt smell
Edit edit: and big thanks to those who alayed my fears this morning, and joined me in my battlecry haha you are all so beautiful! π₯°π₯°
Just got out of bed, feeling a bit fried
Interview later, I wonder if I'll be hired
The cat slept with us, and now he's yowling
Though he's been fed, he thinks his tummy's still growling
Curled up on the couch, heater in my face
I'm anxious about this employment race
It's hard to talk myself up when I'm so iffy
But I'll clean myself up, looking so spiffy
I'll cage up the thoughts that hold me back
And when I get home, I'll have a panic attack
As long as I can hold it until after I'm done
I'll nail this appointment, and then I'll have won.
Finally replacing my absolutely broken down sofa. Man that officeworks armchair was a piece of crap
Itβs amazing how much a positive difference a comfy couch makes in your life. Itβs almost a quality of life change.
Sometimes I feel like an absolute void of nothingness, no one truly cares for ME, no one reaches out via message, I hang out with friends sometimes, but we're not super close. I just feel alone.
Can I help?
You just asking does help a little. Thank you for asking.
π€π€π€ here, have some hugs
Thanks Seagoon β€οΈ
I feel this hard but about my own family; only-child, no-contact with mum, and dad doesn't know what being a dad means, sigh.
I'm sorry you feel disconnected and alone, it's shitty to feel that no one has your back, that no one cares. It sucks when you just want someone to msg and ask if you're okay, and that doesn't happen. I'm so sorry, it is so isolating. It's hard being the first to message, when you just want them to show you they care.
I might not know you personally, irl, but I care. I wonder where you are when you haven't posted in a while. I know it isn't the same, and I am sorry I can't fix this for you. If i could, I would.
I really appreciate it, I'm an only child as well and I thankfully do have my mum and I'm so sorry your parents aren't there for you.
You're right in what you're saying, I just want someone to message and ask if I'm okay and to not always be there one initiating contact.
Thank you for caring and telling me you care, I needed that.
I care too.
Thank you for telling me that.
Day 56 of The Diet. Scales said "That'll do, Raven. That'll do."
Now it's time to ~~eat ALL the things~~ move to a sensible maintenance diet for a while, and focus on my weights routine and building up some muscle. Then four more sets of 5kg dieting interspersed with maintenance/exercise focus. I think this is a good plan, breaking it up into smaller achievable goals rather than trying to do it in one go. Easier to maintain motivation and not to burnout.
900 (!) person traditional wedding at the hotel I'm at. Serious coin was dropped on this one.
To say everyone looks amaze is an understatement.
Everyone is so dressed up.
Dinner has been had. Now to head to the supermarket to pick up a couple of old friends - peanut m&ms and maltesers
It's 7:06 and the 7:00 bus is due to arrive in 8 minutes. This is the end of my story.
[update] The 7:00 bus arrived at 7:14 with nobody on it (apart from the driver). I don't know if he'll make it to the train station in time for me to catch the 7:16 connecting train...
I tend to avoid posting negative comments so... thanks for listening.
That awesome feeling you get when past you is so organise, that it helps out future you. Nothing major just essential items that I need and havenβt been able to get a hand on. This has put me in such a good mood. Lol who am I to be this happy over an essential goods or two π
Was making a dish with red wine as an ingredient last night. Purchased a $12 bottle that ended up being absolutely delightful. The meal was good too. I did go to bed a little buzzy, but no side effects today.
My fever has broken. I continue coughing up crud in a variety of shades. No gym today, I think
I've completed day 2 of exercise regimen and it feels good so far. They're just equipment free 10 minute little workouts, and because they're 10 minutes I can easily say to myself, "oh let's do one now, I've got no excuse to not fit it in." It gets the blood pumping without being too taxing. Can't do in front of Mr Peeler though π
Interview at 1.30pm. Ran out of the MC, had the last of it last night, but was very anxious so I didn't sleep great (just no night-terrors, winning)!
But hopefully I get this job or the other one, then I wont have to worry so much about the insomnia and sleep-avoidance, I can afford psych appts, my medication, bills, rent. I'll feel so much better once work is secured, just getting back on top of it all.
I wish I weren't so broken, that this kind of stuff wouldn't stress me so. That I hadn't had these crises, and that the awful things that happened to me, hadn't have happened at all. I wish I could've just had an average childhood, an average ex, an average life. But I can only do my best with the tools I have been given, and the tools that I have taken.
I can only keep going, this interview is nothing compared to what I've been through. Obviously I got this. I've read the position description, I have my s.t.a.r answers, I'm not stupid, I'm not stupid, I'm not stupid.
(/end-pump-up-selftalk-and-rant)
Edit: punctuation, woman, punctuation!
You're alright. Don't think about the negatives. Think about the positives. You are an asset. You are worthy. Now go out there and give it all you've got. I believe in you. βΊ π
Seconding what CEOofmyhouse said - focus on the positives and remember you're interviewing them as well as them interviewing you.
You're resilient, you're smart, you're prepared and you're an asset to any place that employs you.
Will be cheering you on in spirit this afternoon.
I'm not from Melbourne, but it's great to see Melbourne people using their Fedi alternative to Reddit. The Brisbane one is dead!
It'll be interesting to see what happens long term, especially after apps stop working. I am hoping that there will be enough creative people who move to alternative places that some small vibrant communities can form. I don't want the endless memes and scrolling of Reddit, to me an engaged group of 20 people would be better than 20,000 disengaged scrollers.
Soon to be going to a freshly cleaned bed and pillow, with a new junky post-apocalyptic audiobook (my guilty pleasure). Life ain't so bad
The unit outline for my next uni subject (sustainable design for houses) was released today & I'm pretty happy with what the main assignments involve. I'll basically be making a plan for my own future housing, which is what I want to do for myself anyway & a large part of why I was interested in this course.
Centrelink stopped accepting medical certificates, so I have to do mutual obligations. The DES people want me to apply for 8 jobs that I'm not qualified for every month. They're meant to help me pay for education but according to the guy I have appointments with, they'll only pay half of the course fees.
Also, why the fuck is "free" TAFE allowed to charge so much extra fees? It's not free if I have to pay $510.
I'm just sorta fucked, I suppose. Not sure what I can do, or will do.
one of those days where chronic pain moves from "meh I'm used to it" to "I shall bite people"
so of course it's the day the cats have decided to be Royal Fucking Arseholes
(this isn't mood colouration btw, Punkin is obsessed with going under my desk and fucking around behind the file server - something he has never, in his entire twelve years of life been allowed to do. I've pulled it out, there's nothing behind it, he's just got a bug up his arse. And when told off goes into the kitchen and starts pushing things off the counter in retaliation)
Cool glass of RosΓ©, relaxing on the sofa
Brain's overthinking, turning over and over.
Be cool and calm, composed, assured,
Each fear is stretched and twice measured.
Turned out and raw for the world to see,
Memories sliced up, trauma-sushi
Roll me in rice, in seaweed, I'm salty
Dip me in soy sauce and light green wasabi
Chopsticks and lips, full of umami,
Size me up, please put a fork in me
I'm done ππΌ
Edit: now i want to go to a sushi train ehhh
I had some left over pork and beef mince. I added some onions and a can of Campbell's beef bolognese sauce and the scraps from the tomato sauce bottle. Paired it with beef ravioli and some herbs and spices. It came out alright.
Girly's not eating with us because she's got some sort of mange. It could be my imagination but my throat is getting sore. We shall see tomorrow.
My mind is quietening down. I am learning to shut up and listen with intent for the first time in my life. I've stopped running on caffiene and now enjoy afternoon naps and to wake up to find that my cats have crept onto the bed and are sleeping beside me afterwards fills me with joy. I still need some time off job hunting to work on my recovery but it's going really well so far. One day at a time. I think to bang on the benefits of joining aa is probably unnecessary but I will I've felt more love from the new people I've met in the program than I've felt from most of my real life friends in the last I don't know how many years. I've also found better support for my transition here than in any other place other that I sought out and got myself through professional services. I spent so much time in my community last week I can still feel the euphoria as well, but their support is automatic, yours is a something I am truly grateful for as it's coming from strangers who may or may not know about the incredible personal journeys we go through in the early stages of hormome replacement therapy.
Thank you all, except the person who downvotes all my comments, no thanks for you but no malice toward you either, what you think about me is none of my business.
Am I the only person getting annoyed that James Cameron is all over the news about the Oceangate incident. I mean I get he's an avid ocean explorer, have done the trip many times, and made the damn film but I feel like we should hear from an actual engineer.
Oh my god. Found a box of box of ritz and a 2 bottles of red in the cupboard.
Got so excited I cracked the shiraz open and just poured a glass. Went down so well. Hope itβll last a couple of days without going weird in taste so I can stretch it out for a few days.
Lmao someone or something has it out for me right now, just got the report back from a car I had inspected and it's another no go. I have looked at 6 cars, and had 3 of them inspected, and all have been duds in one way or another. It's not even like I'm looking on the low end, I've a little over 20k to burn, surely things should be decent for that price.
Good morning folks, hope y'all had a great weekend! I built my Nissian Skyline GT-R Lego set and it looks great. Now I just need to see where to put it... somewhere on my bookshelf.
