Well the goally could just grab the ball
this post was submitted on 02 Jun 2026
344 points (98.0% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
40112 readers
3780 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
All players in circle immediately flop and become massively injured, near dead. Cards flicker and flash, going from yellow to red so rapidly, fans see flames and ignite their own (in the stands, just defensively, in case).
Checkmate, goally
Lol. I realized that the red shirts are members of the same team.
Soccer goals are big but I'd assume opposing team could form a barrier
More carnage!
the flopping is relentless...teams of medics rush the field, to no avail...not an injury to be found
(I'm just goofing around to be clear lol)
What kind of Captain Tsubasa shenanigans are these?
Reminds me of the old “change one rule about a sport to make it more entertaining” thing that was popular on AskReddit for a while.
My personal rule change is that the cooler for the ice rink gets turned off ~20 minutes before a hockey game starts, and it turns into a heater instead. Anyone who has ever tried to skate on wet/melting ice knows that you just stick to it like it’s made of clay. All other rules stay the same. As the game progresses, the ice will melt more and more, until the players are basically playing water polo, with like six inches of water on the concrete subfloor.
I would like to add a rule, if the game goes long then all the hockey sticks are exchanged with samurai swords at the discretion of the referee and when the samurai swords are in play then the first team to reach the zamboni can commandeer it as a combat vehicle
This would be an amazing video game with no context going in.
It honestly would and it could use 8 bit graphics and still be amazing
It would lead to a whistle and restart the same way you can't just sit on a ball to waste time. Not sure what the rule is called but yeah it's covered in the rules
Yeah, there's a rule against that, you can't force the ball to stay with you (like holding it between your legs or in between two people)
what if they stayed close but never touched, the ball vibrating between them
If they could pull that off I would not only be impressed but it wouldn't technically break the rules.
hah everything with a temperature is vibrating all the time!
Sorry, bye
load more comments
(3 replies)
load more comments
(1 replies)
I think this would probably be covered by unsporting behaviour or dangerous play.
There might be some stuff that would consider the ball out of play in this scenario too as no specific player has possession, but that might be a stretch
As far as I know it's dangerous play, because you'd be making it impossible for anyone to challenge the ball without things getting dangerous. You're supposed to defend the ball by using your athleticism to fend off your opponents, not by using medieval battlefield tactics to force a siege.
You're supposed to defend the ball by using your athleticism to fend off your opponents, not by using medieval battlefield tactics to force a siege.
Games evolve over time. Get with it or get behind.
Yeah, this is coming, whether you like it or not. Anyone opposed is just regressive and afraid of trying new things and learning new tools. Probably shitty player anyway and scared they won't be able win matches anymore with their mediocre skills in this new world of siege-powered footie.
load more comments
(14 replies)
Surround the players with your own and starve them out.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Pretty sure this will trigger offsides, unless they also trap an opposing team player and take them with them...
A hostage.
Exactly the opposite. Offsite means it is illegal to pass the ball to a player behind the last defender and instead you must walk the ball around said last defender. This tactic is all walking and zero passing so offsite never applies.
Instead its illegal because you are holding the ball. Every move where the ball is stuck for more than like a second is a foul.
What if one guy just bounced the ball on his head constantly while the other 10 players surround him tightly?
Not illegal in theory but easily countered by the enemy team just encircling them or forming a wall. Pushing the enemy team out of the way of the ball bouncer would be a foul.
Also the referee could just call it unsportsmanlike or obstruction of play and give a free kick to the enemy. The referee is basically always allowed to call any bullshit.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Offsides is the most bullshit rule ever invented. "You're behind all our defenders!!!" Yeah no shit that's because I'm trying to SCORE
Offside is essential to keep the game interesting. Otherwise you just have a big dude who hangs out next to the goal all game and you just launch the ball up to that dude whenever you get possession. There's no strategy, no passing, no running with the ball, no dribbling, just launch it to the big guy.
Yeah, I have similar feelings about hockey. Your team’s offense can’t be in front of the puck until it is on the opposing team’s side of the rink. Which functionally means you can’t pass the puck forwards to the offense, because they can’t be on offense until after the puck has crossed the center line.
The defense was caught with their pants down, because the opposing team managed to get a player behind them, and then managed to pass the puck to them? That should be egg on the defense’s face, not a penalty for the offense.
Until after the puck crossed center line
This is not the case, it’s the blue line you cannot cross until the puck has. If you attempt a pass from behind the redline, and no one on your team touches it, then, yes, it’s icing. So that you can’t just throw the puck out on defense.
They came up with it because cherry picking is outrageously boring.
You just reinvented Rugby. Wait till you develop that into American Football.
load more comments
(1 replies)
I had a similar idea for american football.
- Recruit an offensive line entirely of ex-sumo wrestlers
- One holds the ball
- The rest form a protective ring around them
- They casually walk down the field
- Anyone who attempts to tackle them is thrown unceremoniously aside like trash
- Touchdown!
Recruit an offensive line entirely of ex-sumo wrestlers
After the first play they're completely exhausted and unable to continue.
Sumo wrestlers are good at sumo wrestling. Those are matches that last between 2 and 30 seconds, after which the wrestler gets about an hour to rest.
That is what the offensive line is now and they can't grab anyone to throw them aside because that would be holding.
This is literally the point of an offensive line already, you think those boys can't sumo wrestle?
load more comments
(1 replies)
Enders Game (of soccer)
"The enemy goal is down."
Shaolin Soccer
Thus is basically the same as the, now banned, flying wedge in rugby. The manouver aparently lead to twenty two fatalities, as well as inumerable injuries, in a single year.
view more: next ›