338

My wife was threatening to leave me because of my obsession with becoming a tailor. (lemmy.myserv.one)

submitted 8 months ago by JoeKlemmer@lemmy.myserv.one to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

15 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I said, "Fine, suit yourself."

top 15 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[-] Hephoh2@feddit.de 20 points 8 months ago

Seems needle-ss to say that though

[-] thomasloven@lemmy.world 14 points 8 months ago

Seams so.

[-] ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world 9 points 8 months ago

Your skills are indeed tailored for these puns

[-] BrickTamland@lemm.ee 9 points 8 months ago

I'm enjoying this thread

[-] Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 8 points 8 months ago

These puns are sew good I split a seam laughing.

[-] ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world 6 points 8 months ago

A tight-knit bundle of jokes for sure

[-] _haha_oh_wow_@sh.itjust.works 3 points 8 months ago

I'm dyeing! Isn't there some way I can persuede you to stop with the puns?

[-] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 4 points 8 months ago

Agreed. Lets hem it in.

[-] udon@lemmy.world 13 points 8 months ago

I guess your children will grow up in a patchwork family

[-] Tylerdurdon@lemmy.world 8 points 8 months ago

Mine said she was leaving because I had blown our savings on penis extensions.

She couldn't take it any longer.

[-] BenadrylChunderHatch@lemmy.world 7 points 8 months ago

Mine said she was leaving me because of my obsession with The Monkees. I didn't believe her at first, but then I saw her face.

[-] workerONE@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

That's hilarious

[-] speaker_hat@lemmy.one 5 points 8 months ago

Mine left because of my brand new noise cancelling headphones.

She mumbled something vague like "you never listen to me", I didn't quite hear it tbh.

[-] cool_remains_icy@lemmy.one 5 points 8 months ago

Mine threw me out for doing bad Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions. When I left, I said “I will return”.

[-] speaker_hat@lemmy.one 2 points 8 months ago

Mine was because of my obsession to fish.

I said, "So long, and thanks for all the fish."

this post was submitted on 08 Nov 2023

338 points (97.5% liked)

Dad Jokes

14896 readers

13 users here now

Description

This is a community for sharing those cheesy “dad” jokes that invoke an eye roll or chuckle.

Rules

Clean jokes only please. If you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old, you probably shouldn’t post it here. Please post edgier jokes to !unclejokes@lemmy.world
Must post text, image (e.g., meme), or direct link. Do not post external links that cannot be viewed directly from the community (e.g., link to joke website, Facebook, Instagram, etc.)
Follow Lemmy.World Code of Conduct

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

loopy@lemmy.world