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Tl:dR: How can I deal with my hypersensibility without becoming a non-empathic and cold person?

Hey everyone,

I need some advice on what to do. I‘m a 21 yo trans woman in a trans lesbian relationship. My girlfriend (26) is the most wonderful and beautiful person I know. She is truly one of a kind.

Now, my gf is struggling with dysphoria a lot because she had a pretty rough „male puberty“. She has some aspects of her face or her body that she is extremely insecure about. It also adds that her right side of her face is paralyzed, so she can‘t have an even smile and one eye is always a bit more open and she can‘t close that one really. She sees herself as ugly. I‘ll be honest, when I first met her, she looked „weird“ but I couldn’t care less! She is such a beautiful woman and I love her. I also never really cared about looks overall. Personality is so much more important to me!

Now, I‘m diagnosed with potential ROCD, BPD, have ADHD and high functioning autism. Someone really wanted to freaking nerf me. I‘m also extremely hypersensitive. Could be part of my bpd as far as I know, the potential diagnosis is still very fresh.

Now to my problem: In moments like these, where she‘s really dysphoric and hates her body overall (mind you we are both passing in public btw), I really feel her pain. So much it drags me down too. I currently feel like shit. In those moments she really needs to be alone and deal with it alone. I‘d be there for her for whatever she needed.

Now, that this draggs me down too, doesn’t help her. Like, at all. She doesn’t want me to feel bad. Of course I wanna help her and I will always be there for her but she says what she needs is alone time so I‘m giving her that.

But how do can I protect myself? How can I deal with my hypersensibility without becoming a non-empathic and cold person?

Thank you for reading ^^

Heyy, ist hier sonst noch jemand? :3

Liebe Grüße :3

Hey everyone,

I‘m having a very big dilemma currently.

I‘m a 21 yo transfem from Germany. I‘m recently been diagnosed with OCD, mainly ROCD, have ADHD, atypical autism and a tick disorder. On top of that, my therapist told me that it might be possible I have borderline personality disorder, either with or without OCD.

Now, I‘m currently at a point in life where I have never been. I just feel so drained. I have a wonderful life with my wonderful gf and have a great Job. Thing is, I work in IT-Consulting and that shit can be really stressful at times, especially with ADHD.

Last week on Friday, I had the biggest mental breakdown I‘ve ever had. I was just screaming inside for all my pain to end and I was not comfortable to be left alone, so I went with my gf to her therapy appointment, where her therapist also mentioned going to a clinic. On Monday, I actually went. It was okay, but they couldn’t do more than crisis intervention.

Now, I‘ve called in sick for this week. But I don‘t know If I can currently continue working. Just thinking about working again, even though I literally work from home, is so freaking stressful to me :( I don‘t know if I‘m actually mentally drained or if that‘s just me fearing work or whatever.

I don‘t know what to do. I just want to feel better long term :c

Thank you for reading my rant and advice seeking beautiful people :3