charonn0

Took a wrong turn yesterday and didn't realize it for quite a while. Stopped here to get my bearings.

Encountered these big boys while exploring a local bike trail. The photo doesn't do them justice.

Attended the 40th anniversary screening of The Voyage Home in San Francisco tonight.

Nick Meyer was there to answer questions, and was honored by the City of San Francisco with a mayor's certificate for his movies featuring San Francisco.

I cleaned out the junk drawer and found a bunch of Starbucks gift cards that I've received for various reasons over the past 15 years. I used one from 2015 today and the barista was mildly surprised and asked where I got such an old-style card. So I told him about the junk drawer.

A man wakes up with a hangover after a night of drinking. He doesn't even remember how he got home, and is worried that his wife will be mad.

The first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose.

He sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all cleaned and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling!"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper.

His 16 year old son is also at the table, eating. He asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3AM, drunk out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."

Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone, lady, I'm a married man!'"

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.

The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence; then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?"