I don’t know, a lawn with just a small portion mowed and the rest standing tall? That shit would haunt me in my own afterlife.

That or “only following orders.”

Cool, but you know who isn’t getting a free lunch now? Those millionaires who worked so hard for that money. What have those kids done to earn theirs?

/s, to be clear. I wish these cool places to live (e.g, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Michigan) weren’t so fucking cold. Why can’t there be a nice liberal southern state?

My kids would be fine - they hate mushrooms (and most vegetables) right now. Me, on the other hand? I’d be dead.

Two that I often quote:

Into each life, a little rain must fall. (almost always delivered sarcastically)

And:

Well, people in hell want ice water.

I loved that woman. Wish I would have known her better.

I know the answer would be ridiculous if we ever even got one, but I would love to hear about these intolerable abuses or threats of abuses these people were (and presumably still are since, you know, they weren’t successful) facing. That’s not to say there aren’t people in this country dealing with some pretty intolerable things, but I just don’t seem to see them (or hear about their issues) at Trump rallies.

Am I the one that’s out of touch? No, it’s the almost half a million players who are mistaken!

I remember driving through Iowa and seeing vast fields of corn and learning that the majority of that corn was not even destined for human consumption. That kinda blew my mind.

Alone is a great show. But I’ve got to tell you, while I watch and know I do not (currently) possess the skills to do what those folks do, there is a draw for me to want to do it. I mean I’m sure I’m over-romanticizing the thing to an extent, and - again - I know enough about me to know I can’t do it today, but there’s a distinct pull to want to.

Uh, I use bar soap and it doesn’t smell bad. There a loads of small, cottage soap makers who are making really great (and great smelling) soaps. I just prefer those over body wash or whatever.

Skin cancer.

I don’t know if it would be helpful (it may be harmful, who knows…), but I can’t imagine a local news station not being interested in this story. I can hear it now:

Coming up, a local working mom sought permission from her job to pump milk for her newborn during her shift, a practice approved for thousands of working moms nationwide. But her employer said no, and now she’s being forced to find employment elsewhere. 5 on your side investigates next.