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Poorly socialized rule
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2024
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As a man, who knows many "men", I have to say, a lot aren't being raised.... At all.
I was like that, dad left when I was 11 and mom was majorly depressed. Watched a shit ton of YouTube and thankfully found myself on the good side. Around this time there was the war between Logan Paul and the rest of the internet and I watched a lot of commentators call his shit out.
Probably not the best for me, but it did teach the basic morals of "don't be an asshole". Most other kids watched Logan/Jake Paul and were insufferable fucks.
To summarize my youth: the only stuff I learned, outside of school, was taught to me by my brothers, in the form of bullying.
I was the youngest.
What I'm most annoyed by is that my dad, a teacher, with a bachelor's in bookkeeping, taught me exactly nothing about money.
They fed me, and I got older, but I raised myself. I learned how to handle my own finances, and live on my own, because they certainly didn't help me in that regard, and when I found myself basically on my own at 16, after my parents divorced and I was essentially abandoned, I had to sort my shit out damn fast. It was sink or swim.
Obviously there's a lot more to it than that, but I'll tell you this: as a teenager, I had no goddamned idea how to shop for groceries, or cook for myself.
I try not to bitch about it too much because that was more than 20 years ago now. I don't want to compare my challenges to anyone else.
My entire point is that, I wasn't taught anything. I figured it out without any help. The difference between a man, and a child who got older, is whether you taught yourself how to be self sufficient, when everyone else decided that you were old enough to know everything you needed to know, when nobody has actually explained anything to you about how to survive, then pushed you out the door.... If you experienced that, and you figured it out. Welcome to adulthood, congrats. If you were never in a situation where if you missed a couple of shifts at work, you'd have to sleep under a bridge, then, IDK. Sounds a bit pampered to me.
I relate, kind of.
They feed you and expect you to grow but they didn't have a plan on how to mautre just a list of don'ts you have to follow.
Do as I say!
Don't talk back!
Becuase I said so!
Some just wait all the life to be in that position of power and now they are removed from it telling them they are wrong. If you think about it is almost a given they'll turn to right wing if they promise them the price they were denied...
I hate the mentality of "I had to suffer, so you should have to suffer too!"
And so many of them have that attitude.
It's just gross
It's funny that you both place quotation marks around men, showing you don't believe they are, and yet pretend that you think the fault is in how they're being raised.
It's like the dichotomy escapes you. Are they real men raised poorly? Or are they fake men and therefore they're not the subject of this discussion at all?
I don't expect you to have any reasonable response though because clearly the misandrist brain rot hit you pretty hard. My condolences. Maybe you should isolate though.
What even is this response?
I was raised. I raised myself.
I see a lot of boys who are so sheltered from the world that they can't even make hot pockets or do their laundry without someone helping them.
I wanted to be raised by my parents and I was forced to raise myself. I don't say this to garner any sympathy, because I know I won't get any. I'm not going to throw myself a pity party because I was left to figure it out.
The only point I'm making, if any at all, is that: school doesn't prepare you for life. It certainly didn't prepare me for life... And parents should be teaching their kids how to deal with stuff, and think about their choices so they can make good ones without needing to be told what to do.
I had to figure that out on my own. It's 100% possible to have a very easy upbringing and be raised right.
I don't think I need to tell anyone that nobody gives a fuck about how you feel or how much you're struggling, if you have a dick between your legs, and that demonstrates the problem in society. Boys will "figure it out".
Most of them don't, more than a few, never will.
What's all this shit about being raised? Who raised you?