is it too much to ask to want others to validate/affirm you? (lemmygrad.ml)

submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by Alunyanners@lemmygrad.ml to c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@hexbear.net

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don't fucking lecture me by saying that i "don't need others to validate me since i'm already a woman" or that "i don't ACTUALLY need others to validate/affirm me, i can do it myself".

like yes i can do that but it fucking hits different when someone else says that. especially if it's someone close to you.

but apparently it's too hard for some people to tell a trans woman in need that they'll "always be a woman". even if you explicitly fucking request that. even if that someone is your partner who also happens to be a trans woman.

apparently according to her i don't need anyone else "to tell me that" because "i'm already a woman"

i hate this constant dismissal of what i need. just tell me what i want and i'll get out of your fucking way.

makes me wonder what's the point of having friends/partners even is when you can't even depend on rely on others and ALWAYS GOTTA FUCKING DO EVERYTHING YOURSELF to get what you want

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[-] frauddogg@hexbear.net 14 points 2 months ago

is it too much to ask to want others to validate/affirm you

Hardly. External recognition as what you feel you are, even if just from one person, can be the foundation of the identity's formation/coalescence. It doesn't make you lesser; especially not for vocalizing that need.

this post was submitted on 19 Oct 2024

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