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I was 28 when I was diagnosed autistic. Up until then I had just assumed I was shitty and worthless. Turns out there has never been anything wrong with me, it's actually society that has failed me.
37 when I found out. Surprised I even made it this far, doing a bit better now that I know now.
Hey, I was the same age. I've gotten a lot better but if I'd learned years earlier, maybe I wouldn't have had so much of my life where I was doped to the gills for being "weird and sensitive".
Excellent! There are definitely both pros and cons to finding out, but I believe that the pros outweigh the cons. Perhaps the most significant pro is that it helps alleviates self hatred.
A friend showed me the movie "Mary and Max" (2009) which has an early scene where they describe the behaviors of Max, an autistic man. That's what started me down the rabbit hole. All undiagnosed adults are aware how different they are compared to others, but that awareness is mostly suppressed by masking. Mostly.
I'm actually on the spectrum myself so I do understand you more than neurotypicals
I know that shitty and worthless Feeling, like you can't do anything and have to rely on others and you're useless outside of the small things you do know how to do
The part of your comment about society failing you really reminds me of how bad my school was at teaching, yes they had a support person in classes sometimes to help you if you got stuck and here in Australia in high-school they have a subject / class specifically for people with disabilities alongside your regular subjects / classes but I still felt they just made things easier for me and did the bare minimum in teaching me skills to support myself instead of relying on others for help when I got stuck on something
It also reminds me of how parts of society build up support structures for people on the spectrum without involving people on the spectrum at all so they think the structures will work for every autistic person without out having actually having involved people on the spectrum to help them see what it's actually like as an autistic person on the spectrum and get feedback from us on what can be done to better support us
I do like that NDIS (National Disability Insurance Service) here in Australia involves you in planning but it's still just picking parts of that existing support structure that was made without autistic peoples input