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101

Is there a way to geht honest feedback on how you behave? (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 1 day ago by LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

51 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Bit of a shower thought: Outside of limited circumstances, like interviews or therapy, nobody is really expected to give you honest feedback on how you come across.

This sucks. I've been told I come across as unfriendly once, but I have no idea if I was just nervous and tired at the time. I still cherish that one moment almost 10 years ago when someone told me I was funny in some corporate team building bs.

Now, I could ask friends and family, but I believe they would probably not tell me the full, honest truth. After all, they (hopefully) like me and I would probably avoid being too harsh to everyone but very close people in private.

At the same time, I know plenty of people who really should get some feedback, who probably believe they are funny while everyone is bored and annoyed and hopes they talk a little less and the like.

So, are there socially accepted ways to get feedback on how you come across?

I realize that people are strange, relationships are hard, P!=NP and anime is not real. Still, it would be nice to have.

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[–] Mountainaire@lemmy.world 1 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

nobody knows me enough to not tell me my idea is stupid

What about the possibility that nobody here thinks your idea is stupid? I certainly don't. I think feedback is extremely important and that this is a great question (which can only be solved by first having close, mature friends, and asking them).

[–] LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 hour ago

Sorry, you misunderstand me, I think: I meant I am posting here, exactly because nobody here knows me well enough to really care about my feelings. So, if what I say is stupid, a random anonymous stranger is more likely to tell me than a friend. Bit of a meta question thing, I know.

For the actual question, it's kind of the same: an irl friend is at least a bit biased towards not trying to hurt my feelings. I know I do at least, if a friend asked me how he came across, I'd be inclined to be at least a bit diplomatic. Which is why I am looking for other ideas.