Everyday I fantasizes about feeding the bourgeoisie to komodo dragons after the revolution. As the news about his ailing health trickles in, I'm slowly realizing that I will never see Mitch McConnell being eaten alive by komodo dragons
this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2026
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Honestly, i think komodo dragons are a bit overrated, asian water monitors or crocodile monitors are much cooler and not that much smaller. Croc monitors in particular also have an incredibly vicious bite, they have these super sharp steak knife teeth that are the longest teeth of all monitor lizard species, they could have taken Mitch Mc Connel apart like a rotisserie chicken.
You just know he already has the consistency of pulled pork
I actually had a really good vegan pulled pork sandwich after the pride parade last weekend. It has been said on here that McConnel counts as vegan, and i have been compared to a monitor lizard before. I'm mentioning all of these entirely unrelated things for no specific reason.
Fair point, but I don't think monitor lizards will tear Mitch McConnell limbs to limbs like a group of komodo dragons would. They also can't swallow Mitch McConnell whole. So I would still prefer to throw Mitch McConnell into the komodo dragon pit. We can consider throwing someone annoying like Ben Shapiro into the monitor lizard pit, that'll be funnier