this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2026
25 points (100.0% liked)
Embassy of Hexbear on Lemmygrad
176 readers
1 users here now
Hexbear's Diplomatic Mission to Lemmygrad
Fostering friendly relations between the sister socialist Intances of Lemmygrad and Hexbear
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Sorry, I don't understand what you want. Could you state what action you want or are you wanting to vent? As the question in the post title as well as the question in the second section of the post body seem to indicate you do want to discuss hexbear moderation
Sorry for the unclarity. In brief: Hexbear moderators and admins should not allow a comment that slanders Lemmygrad to the extent of accusing Lemmygrad of being a misogynist space. I would ask for this comment to be removed, and for this to be clarified to the user in question and the moderators of that community.
What I meant earlier was that I am not judging the other moderation actions on the community or the post, since it doesn't concern me. I only made this post because the comment is directly slandering Lemmygrad as an instance, not because of Hexbear's position on the topic of sex work.
Thank you for clarifying I didn't want to start a discussion if you were just wanting to vent or misunderstand you.
We don't have a rule about people sharing their opinion on federated instances. There are multiple comments on lemmygrad sharing their opinions about hexbear.
As mentioned by Slay the topic of sex work has been historically a point of contention between the people of hexbear and lemmygrad. I will talk to the moderator team about "posts/comments that slander lemmygrad/federated instances" and encourage moderators to remind people that we should aim for education over bullying.
To further clarify, I don't believe that bullying or harsh tones are a problem in general, just that cases where accusations of bigotry are levied should be treated with special consideration.
People should not be able to get away with a throw-away comment that accuses an entire community of being racist, misogynist, transphobic, abelist, etc. without proof. To further drive this point home, if a Hexbear user accuses a federated instance of being a misogynist space, would you not want to follow up on that as Hexbear admins? Would you want to be federated with a misogynist space that makes your users unsafe and uncomfortable? Bigotry should be treated seriously.
I'm familiar with Hexbear's culture and I'm not trying to police mostly harmless dunking or trash talking.
Our federation allow-list is largely determined by the local users, in the event the userbase thought that lemmygrad had widespread misogyny I'm sure there would be a post calling for defederation with many supporters. I would suppose the person who made the comment would point to the removed comments as proof as well as the fact that this has been a disagreement with history.
lemmygrad drinks poop from a piss jar
mods are too scared to ban me
No seriously, you want our instance to police trash talk? People are going to go off on their feelings sometimes and call you a liberal. Chill with it. If deep down they're wrong or they're right, just self crit. And if they're wrong it's not like they're wrong in the wrong way. See what they're on about.
No, Hexbear has a different culture and rules and that's fine. I'm not concerned with trash talk or posting PPB or calling Lemmygrad names or whatever. Accusing an instance of being a misogynist or "incel" space is beyond the realm of trash talk, however.
It paints the entire community as bigoted or a space that allows bigotry. Accusations like this are serious and shouldn't be allowed as "trash talk" or just for fun.
how is it not permitted to say a community is too permissive of misogyny
why is that a taboo accusation
Is the accusation warranted tho? I haven't interacted that much with lemmygrad users but never noticed any sort of rampant misogyny. I agree with OP this seems like unnecessary behavior.
I noticed that little scuffle and I agree, "incelgrad" made me cringe and seemed like it was at least three or four notches of hostility higher than was necessary. If it wasn't so sincerely mean-spirited it would be comical, like "fuck you and the horse you rode in on" type of thing.
I'm not saying it should be taboo, I'm saying it's something that should be treated seriously, not as a jab, trash talk, or unsubstantiated statement.
Again, I'm not trying to criticise Hexbear's culture and I'm certainly not bothered or annoyed when people make fun of other instances or insult them, etc. I'm just saying that accusations of bigotry especially are serious and should be treated seriously. You can call people libs or a bunch of names, sure, but calling them racist, for example, is a serious accusation.
I hope you understand where I'm coming from. I just think bigotry should not be taken lightly.