this post was submitted on 28 Aug 2023
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Every president needs a Cadaver Synod which results in the hand they swore on the Bible to be removed and their exhumed corpses thrown into the river Potomac.
that would just poison the water working people in the area rely on. better to dump them into some ravine to be eaten by bugs.
You'd poison the bugs and anything else that eats bugs.
Throw them in a volcano.
how about shooting them into the sun?
That can get expensive pretty quickly, how about we just chuck them in the dumpster behind the 7-11?
we can just batch them all, living and dead, into a single capsule so we only need a single launch.
And nothing of value would have been lost in the event of a catastrophic launch failure.
Unfortunately the delta-v requirements for a solar "landing" are already absurd (think having an entire Saturn V in orbit, and that still not being enough). How about conscripting them into being the brave astronauts on the Voyager 3 mission, where they will journey aimlessly outside of our solar system? A rocket capable of putting a man on Mars would be very easily capable of yeeting a man out of the solar system.
ngl, hadn't done the math but it surprises me that it's easier to get to the outer solar system than to perform a solar "landing". we don't need to include an oxygen tank, right? should save some weight so they craft can get further from any planets -- wouldn't want to pollute Mars or something by accident.
It's a shame we embalm bodies.